Reactions.
I would like to thank those that have offered words of support and encouragement I would also like to thank those who have found themselves reacting negatively, for I get to be reminded how difficult it is for all of us to acknowledge our fear and how we defend against it by judging and defining ourselves and others. I don’t want to linger in the negative, I want to acknowledge how instructive it can be.
As any of us, I have received through my life lessons an experience that has come to motivate much of what I do. It has inspired my creativity and made me see the importance of reaching out and sharing. That is what I am doing. I am sharing what has come through me and my life. I am not proslytizing. I am not preaching. I certainly don’t want to preach.
Perhaps what I have learned and what I study is not as easy to share as I had hoped. You will note that I did not say I was going to suspend all communication with my blogs, just that I found it impractical, given the amount of time in the day, to answer all. This is difficult, for it is in my nature, it is in all of our natures to want to communicate, to share. It’s part of experiencing ourselves as together in this journey of life. One of the recent blogs asks how we are to teach, or share and be of help to our children who are so innocent and open with their feelings. My first reaction is that we have more to learn from our children and being in their presence than we often admit. And while half of being a teacher is to acknowledge our desire to learn, the opposite is true. For what is teaching but a ‘sharing,’ a desire to communicate our life’s experience in an effort to help ourselves learn and recognize ourselves in each other, in order to experience/know our existence as ‘shared’…that we are not alone. So, as I share and teach, I study and learn. The best way to teach our children, (those inside of each of us as well), is to listen, hear and be taught by them in their yet to be inhibited ability to stay present. Then what we are teaching them mirrors the best in them and in ourselves, and gives them the reaffirming experience of being together. This experience, this ‘knowing’ of our one-ness constitutes hope and our faith that we can return to that knowing, that feeling.
I have to acknowledge that my innocence would have me believe that all will hear and understand what I share. The truth is that some will and some won’t. Some will feel what I share, not because of who they perceive I am or am not, but because what I share resonates in their own experience. For those that find my shared thoughts frustrating, confusing, pretentious, presumptuous or just plain negative, I would humbly ask you to try not to judge me or yourselves. Instead, you might witness your own reactions and words and the extent to which you need to define me. It’s an interesting excersize, because as we witness our feelings and thoughts and don’t try to defend or justify them, but see them as something that is happening to us and something we are reacting to, we get to make the distinction between the part of us that is learned behavior/conditioning, and the part of us that transcends that behavior and allows us to recognize ourselves in each other.
I always find that I learn more from my negative reactions, (read: ‘expressions of fear’) and those of others when I am able to not personalize or judge them.
Someone wrote that this all seemed a defense on my part, a need to withdraw from people and from my feelings. This is not my intention, nor my need. On the contrary, it is to find and experience my connection to my humanity and the humanity of others. Celebrity is an odd experience in that the object of celebrity often becomes a canvas where others get to paint their needs, their fantasies. We all have a need to ‘celebritize,’ to take someone we ‘connect’ with and see our own humanity in and make them more than human, make them more powerful than us. We make them our heroes who, we fantasize, don’t have to deal with the fear of powerlessness like we do. We then want to touch them, adore them, have something of them, an autograph, a ‘hello’ a photo. We need to put them there and we resent any effort or occurence that makes them human. It’s as if we want to have our cake and eat it too. We want our ‘gods’ and at the same time we need them to be human, so we tear them down, or sacrifice them…(ie. the virgin thrown into the volcano), or take exception to their own human efforts to deal with powerlessness.
I remember when my t.v. series had taken off and I was being ‘celebrated,’ I was invited to a birthday bash where there happened to be a lot of celebrities. I was standing by the buffet, (there’s that ‘eating’ thing again), and I heard a voice that sounded really familiar, turned around and bumped into Cary Grant, one of my heroes. I couldn’t speak. This man had come to represent so much to me as an actor, had become such a ‘god’ to me, that I could only look away. How is that different from someone idolizing Starsky and then trying to relate to me. They don’t really know me…any more than I ‘knew’ Cary Grant. Yet I had built a tremendous amount of fantasy about what Cary Grant was like because I had experienced a connection to him, something in him that I wanted to experience in myself. Had I ever met Cary Grant thereafter, I most likely would have been brought up short when I got close to him and saw the cracks, the foibles, his yearning, his humanity.
I do not find any strength in setting myself apart. I yearn for connection the same as any person. However I also have to take some responsibility for this occurrence of celebrity and try to understand the nature of it and establish parameters that allow me to live my life and continue to learn. My life’s experience has accrued into these lessons that I seek to share through my ‘celebrity’ on this relatively new phenomenon, the internet. It does not mean that what I say is ‘gospel’ truth, only that it is my truth and has moved me to write two books, has inspired, I now realize so much of my creativity, and my celebrity or visibility gives me the opportunity to share what I am learning.
Perhaps this is too great an effort to answer the negativity I perceive while I try to understand it.
Okay, that’s my blog. Thank you for allowing me to share.
pmg.
By sknash, January 15, 2010 @ 5:37 am
Paul,
thank you again for your heartfelt comments. While I may not always understand what you are saying or other folks are, I know it is truly sincere and heartfelt and if I stop, listen and feel, I can usually figure it out. YOu make me think about me, my life, how to make each day better than the other and in these times, that is so important. The person who screamed at you on the phone today may be the person who just received a cancer diagnosis three hours ago. I enjoy your philosophy and will continue to admire your thoughts, your works and anxiously await the publishing of your books. Like I have said previously, you were the light in my dark many years ago and I can only hope maybe someday when our paths might meet, and I turn around and you’re standng there, I will personally thank you for your light in my life. Thanks for sharing. Love & Blessings-Susan
By sknash, January 15, 2010 @ 5:47 am
One more thought, I like what you said about learning from our children. My son is 22, while he is no angel, he has the heart of gold. I have never seen a young person be so nonjudgemental, always looking at both sides, never degrading one for their thoughts. I catch myself sometimes in his presence when I start to say something negative and look at him and think, wow, Christopher would never think that. People comment that I am 53 and when am I going to grow up and I ask them why do I need to grow up? The child like innocence, the ability to see beauty in evertyhing, man, we have so much to learn from our children. And our older folks. Having been a caregiver for my mother-in-law for 15 years and now my mother for the last 12 years and a grandmother prior to all of this, I have treasured their memories. They are our past and should be cherished, our children are our future and should be cherished and encouraged. Sometimes the old and the young are forgotten. I try to make sure they are not. And Christopher’s going to school to be a teacher and I just beam because I know whatever child gets him as their teacher, they will have a fantastic journey as I have being his mother for 22 years. Now its off to work. Have a great Friday everyone and a wonderful week. Florida is finally thawing out. Susan
By valerie, January 15, 2010 @ 6:55 am
Bonjour,
J’écris en français, car je ne voudrais pas faire de contre-sens.
J’ai été extrêment touchée par votre message d’aujourd’hui. Je vous ai sentiment à travers vos mots, très triste que ce début d’expérience de blog ne soit pas ce que vous attendiez. Ne vous en faites pas pour la plupart, la démarche de nous faire partager quelques unes de vos réactions philosophiques au sujet de la vie a été comprise. Ne tenez pas compte du négatif.
Je n’ai moi-même pas compris certaines réactions lorsque je lisais les messages. Et pourtant, mon anglais est « moyen ». j’ai senti que cela partait sur d’autres chemins.
Prenez soin de vous.
Comme je l’ai écrit hier, c’est déjà un bonheur d’avoir accès à certaines de vos réflexions philosophiques. et pour cela, je vous remercie.
Vous faites déjà beaucoup et avez fait beaucoup. Prenez le temps pour vous aussi, et ceux que vous aimez.
j’attends avec impatience de lire votre livre.
avec toute mon affection
see you soon.
Valerie
By hilly, January 15, 2010 @ 7:02 am
thank you for sharing your thoughts and tolerating our comments, Paul.
I need more time to read and re-read this blog because there is so much to consider before commenting any more.
But I do so agree with Valèrie when she says that it is a (lucky) pleasure [bonheur] to have access to your shared thoughts and philosophy and I join with her in thanking you for that.
By G, January 15, 2010 @ 8:18 am
So….. every day lately I receive the Publishers Clearing House” Search & Win email and today (maybe this is my lucky day?) decided to put in the name of my first passionate love (who, needless to say did not return the favor in 1963 in Williamstown), clicked on Paul Michael Glaser webpage and my, oh my…. what a wonderful surprise! It is indeed my lucky day!
How wonderful to be able to share these writings, Paul, which coincidentally (is there such a thing) zapped into the thoughts that began in my early teens: I was going to help change the world by helping people rid themselves of fear. After all, we are all here to change the world, correct?
What I did not realize in my early teens was that one had to live through, face, get flattened, pick oneself up again, listen and share to get through the fears, angers and depressions that may lurk around each corner, and that the simple complexities or complex simplicities of all our shared experiences in those “negatives” are necessary to appreciate “the positives”.
I so look forward to reading more of your thoughts, Paul.
Thank you for the wonderful surprise.
Perhaps someday we will meet again….
Genevieve
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 15, 2010 @ 8:42 am
DEAR PAUL YOUR YOU ARE A CELEBRITY BUT AS TO BE HUMAN YOU ARE BETTER NO LONGER I SEE YOU LIKE (STARSKY) IF LIKE PAUL M GLASER A WONDERFUL HUMAN BEING WHO SHARES HIS LESSONS OF THE LIFE AND ONE LEARNS OF THE OTHER IS A ROUNDTRIP .NO I HAVE TO YOU LIKE A GOD IF LIKE A HUMAN BEING WITH HIS DEFECTS AND VIRTUES. AND I RESPECT TO YOU LIKE SUCH THANKS TO SHARE A LITTLE YOUR LIFE AND YOUR THOUGHTS THAT ARE REWARDING GOD BLESSES TO YOU —HILDA LIPORACE-
By lady800cc, January 15, 2010 @ 10:16 am
Hi PMG, Pam and Blog Fam,
I REALLY enjoyed reading this blog. I totally connected with everything; and you made me think about the decisions I have made in my life. When I was in my early twenties, I had a hit record in Europe. It went as high as number 6 on Euro-pop. I went over for a tour and was overwhelmed at the reception and how so many just wanted to see me, to touch me, to talk to me. What I call my “15 min” pales in comparison, but I feel myself connecting to your words. People would do mini monologues about me, to me, when they just met me, as if they knew me. They never knew how I felt sick to the point of passing out before going on stage or the intense fear I had of hitting a bad note. Your story about Cary Grant reminds me of being scheduled on the same show with a very popular act at the time; I froze when I met them and wondered how could I, me, find myself in the same space. I have been asked over and over through the years why didn’t I continue, what happened; they assume I regret deciding to continue life in obscurity. I gave up explaining the fact that I love my life and do not regret a single thing; good or bad. But you have made me wonder if I unnecessarily made “recoiling” part of my persona. The immediate “No” I give at requests to sing; partly because I have to give over a little of myself and partly because I’ve never believed I was worthy or good enough in the first place [although contrary to response]. I’ve pushed back so hard and for so long, I wonder if I really had the right to… That is not to say I regret my career choices, but ask myself, if I shirked my responsibility to my small celebrity in some way. Paul, I have to say that in this moment, I feel change stirring [talking or typing out ones feelings can do that]; and I think I will pause before I let the next “No” pass by my lips so quickly. This blog seems to be giving me an opportunity to express my thoughts, unabridged and I am so glad I am a part of it Thanks!
By Rike, January 15, 2010 @ 10:19 am
Dear Paul,
trying to sort my thoughts and putting them into words that hopefully make sense
Never got the impression you are preaching, or proselytizing. To me personally this blog has become a place (in a very short time) I find a great variety of suggestions and representations, opinions, offers, aphorism, thoughts… Things to make me think, some I can agree to, others I have a different opinion of.
You wrote about ‘idolizing’ – what it probably does to us or what we do out of it. I think it’s easy to ‘heroize’ someone, being a ‘celebrity’ because we don’t know ‘the real person’ behind. And it’s easy to ‘destroy’ someone for the same. It’s easy to make false conclusions in either way.
I have my ‘own’ heroes – especially my Dad because he taught me how to make the best of all that life offers. Until the very end he told me: Life is beautiful. Sometimes I forget – need to remind myself once in a while…. I try to make priorities, try to change things for the better, work hard on me to accept things I cannot change, like the chronic disease my son suffers from.
I have friends I ‘look’ up to – for the things they gave me with their friendship – without them I wouldn’t probably sit here. They were there for me in my darkest hours. I try to give back to others as best I can. I have people I look up to, even though I don’t ‘know’ them. I look up to them because what they say and how they live have a positive impact in my life – like what you share with us. As I said, I don’t see you like a preacher – plain and simple as someone who shares from his own experiences. I can take what is offered – or I can leave it where it is.
Anyway – hope it makes a little sense. Thanks again for all you share…
By Christine, January 15, 2010 @ 11:05 am
Hi Paul, Your comments have really made me think this afternoon. I have as you know, admired you for over 30 years. There is a lot of truth in our need to as you say ‘celebritize’ someone. I have done that with you over the years,(or should that be do? no, maybe now I see a compassionate, caring man behind the celebrity). The interesting thing is how you felt when you saw Cary Grant,( I used to watch all his films with my late mam when I was a child, he had a lovely voice) anyway somehow we don’t expect an actor to be for want of a better word ‘starstruck’ by another actor, just like dare I say it the rest of us!. When I met you in Sunderland, the time I stood waiting with my daughter all I was thinking was ‘what am I going to say? I almost needed my heart spray to calm my thumping heart! It was more of a ‘talk to Paul now,or you may never get the chance again’! I mean what are the chances of you being in Sunderland? I have tried as I got older to see you as another human being, instead of a celebrity. Although you are if I may say a very special man.Its lovely to blog you,to as you say feel a connection. Personally, you have always managed to lift me whenever I’ve hit rock bottom even before this blog. I hope you get as much out of this blog as we do, It would be nice to think we could do something for you. With love and respect, Christine xx
By Rach1970, January 15, 2010 @ 11:33 am
Hi Paul
Thank you for your lovely comments and for your honesty. I appreciate what you write because I’m learning and it makes me think. That’s a good thing!*G* Thank you for your suggestions on teaching children. I have two sons aged 15 and 13 years old. My youngest son with Autism can read and write. He speaks very clearly too*g*.
My thoughts on the celebrity are we as nations do build people up and when they do something wrong people tear down, when it was none of our business in the first place. I’ve seen it on You Tube and I think its mean. I try to be the positive light and redirect folks. Because let’s face it if we all stood in front of a mirror and seriously looked at ourselves we wouldn’t be so quick to judge others. That’s how I live by. On this celebrity subject I do like Starsky and Hutch but for me it was because of the humanness of the show. I don’t get the car thing and I’ve come to appreciate both yourself and David as people. I’m also blessed to have a BFF like yours and it’s a rare gift.
Being positive in this world is hard, but we’ll keep on trying: To lending a helping hand, be supportive, be loyal, and being kind. One step at a time we can all make a difference.
TGIF!!! I can’t get anymore positive than that on a Friday!!!! To quote Jackie Gleason “How sweet it is”!
Hugs, Rach
By marly, January 15, 2010 @ 2:28 pm
Dear Paul,
For the past few weeks I’ve been reading most of these blogs ánd your comments on some of them.
I must confess that at times I felt quite overwhelmed by it all…..so many bloggers sharing their deepest thoughts,emotions ánd fears with you and us, the other bloggers.
It taught me that no matter all the(seemingly)differences between us in fact we’re all the same,simply because we’re all human beings trying to find our way through the woods.
At the same time I was wondering why all these people,including myself,felt so compelled to react on your blogs in such an open,frank manner,having full trust in a man they don’t really know…
What if you would have been completely unknown to us/me?
This celebrity thing can be a handicap at times but indeed,” ….my celebrity or visibility gives me the opportunity to share what I am learning.” It can be an advantage as well.Just because of your celebrity status you’re able to reach more people than someone who hasn’t got that status.
I must confess personally I felt some resistance at first when you started blogging.
I questioned myself whether I would consider these blogs seriously if they had not been written by you,Paul M.Glaser who used to be one of my favorite actors in my teens.
This may sound rather corny to you but
to me it was an important issue.
I finally came to the conclusion that I was able to look beyond Paul M. Glaser “the actor” because I realized that because of my preconceptions about you(which say a lot more about me than about you!) I was denying myself an opportunity to learn.
In the end I found that I could be objective enough and by doing so I gave myself the opportunity to listen to what you were trying to communicate.
PMG “the blogger”managed to catch my attention with his words/thoughts and I found myself considering ánd reconsidering
them again and again up to this very day.
Having to deal with the language barrier I had to make sure to translate all of it in order to understand exactly what was being “said”(meant).
Well……every time I managed to translate one of your blogs and tried to comprehend what you were actually trying to put across I had to start anew because of your follow up comments!
No need to say that I spent the past few weeks studying very hard (which gave me a lot of pleasure!).
Being who I am I traveled the internet,read some of books about mindfulness and did a lot of talking to myself(my favorite pass time) searching and researching to find whether I could relate to your thoughts on fear of death/fear of powerlessness in the face of death.
What can I tell you?It’s a work in progress…..
I don’t consider your shared thoughts as “gospel “truth,they are shared thoughts,period.
I need to process these insights of you and find out for myself what all these thoughts really mean to me,how I can relate to them and if/how I can integrate these thoughts into my life and by extension share what I’m able to share with others.
Last but not least:
“One of the recent blogs asks how we are to teach, or share and be of help to our children who are so innocent and open with their feelings. My first reaction is that we have more to learn from our children and being in their presence than we often admit. And while half of being a teacher is to acknowledge our desire to learn, the opposite is true. For what is teaching but a ’sharing,’ a desire to communicate our life’s experience in an effort to help ourselves learn and recognize ourselves in each other, in order to experience/know our existence as ’shared’…that we are not alone. So, as I share and teach, I study and learn. The best way to teach our children, (those inside of each of us as well), is to listen, hear and be taught by them in their yet to be inhibited ability to stay present. Then what we are teaching them mirrors the best in them and in ourselves, and gives them the reaffirming experience of being together. This experience, this ‘knowing’ of our one-ness constitutes hope and our faith that we can return to that knowing, that feeling.”
Thank you so much for this comment on my blog.
With your wise words/advice your’re holding up a mirror to me ,who’s often too busy teaching to take enough time to listen,hear and be taught by her children(ánd by the child inside herself as well).
I totally agree with you that we have more to learn from our children and being in their presence than we often admit.(That’s exactly the reason why I love my work that much!)
Take care,Paul
With respect and kind regards,
Marly
By Saskia, January 15, 2010 @ 4:04 pm
It must be such a weird experience. Having someone (or millions in your case) see you as a celebrity.
You are a man who is doing something he loves to do; act, direct, write etc. And because you are doing something you love, people then grow to love you,or in some cases the role you are playing.
Having people constantly idolizing you must get a bit…Tedious at times. They not knowing the ‘real’ you but thinking they do, thinking they know you better than anyone etc must be sometimes, so annoying.
They’ve never been there for you when you’ve laughed so hard you cry, or when you cry so hard you don’t think you will stop. They’ve never been there to comfort you or crack that winning joke; but they wish they had.
Being in the public eye, must have its draw backs but also pluses. Someone who respects you, not just because you are famous must be so heart warming. Having someone idolize ‘Starsky’ and not you must be plain weird!
I admire you very much, for your acting. When I seen you in Aladdin you were absolutely magic. You captured the audience so well, along with your fellow cast. I would love just LOVE to have your talent in acting. It’s always been one of my dreams to be able to act well, without being too shy.
You seem to have a very philosophical side to you, and that intrigues me. I love philosophy. Not having an answer, but being able to look at so many possibilities is mind blowing. Exciting. I want to Teach Philosophy. But I find it more a deep discussion everyday. It’ll be brilliant.
I would love to know your views on the world, God, Creation etc. but maybe some views can’t be shared without offending others. Although an opinion can never be wrong.
Sorry for rambling. It’s kind of like writing in a diary writing this. Getting out everything I’ve been thinking. Hope it’s not too boring
Best wishes.
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 15, 2010 @ 4:18 pm
querido Paul hoy escribire en mi idioma para no estar pensando que se termina el el espacio del traductor-Paul hace 30 años que vi la serie Starsky and hutch siempre lo he seguido me gustaba su personaje pero atraves del tiempo empece a mirar al ser humano por que para mi sus hojos son el reflejo de su alma parece cursi pero es real uno siempre idealiza a las personas pero si uno empieza a ser mas observador se da cuenta que usted es un ser humano como yo con virtudes y defectos cuando leo sus escritos es como si fuera una hermosa carta de un amigo ,uno aprende de los amigos y ellos de mi cada uno tiene sus experiencias en la vida todo absolutamente todo es para un crecimiento personal he aprendido en muy temprana edad a tener repeto y amor al projimo y en estos momentos estoy aprendiendo de mi hija trate de darle lo mejor de mi ¿o se lo di?es por eso que me enseña cada dia y uno tiene que estar dispuesto aprender del otro realmente esto es maravilloso poder compartir tus pensamientos y los mios asi que gracias por todo no hay casualidades hay causalidades en la vida todo tiene un para que nuevamente gracias paul amigo mio y te amo como persona hasta escribi una poesia dedicada a tus ojos “ojos azules” esta en el foro de facebook -yo tambien busque refugio por decirlo de una forma en la pintura y la escritura a fluido de mi el arte ¡¡ ves ¡¡ todos los dias se aprende algo en nuestra vida … te aprecio con todo mi cariño y amor –Hilda Liporace — DIOS TE BENDIGA Y TE SIGA ILUMINANDO EN ESTE CAMINO QUE ES LA VIDA …GRACIAS ,GRACIAS Y GRACIAS
By LML, January 15, 2010 @ 5:39 pm
I too understand the difficulties in getting a message across solely in text. So much comes from body language, tone of voice…but your posts are lovely, sir, and I continue to look forward to reading them. It’s when we contemplate our navels that we learn so much more about ourselves.
That said, why is this Pam posting her credentials as a comment? That feels a bit offputting and distracts from your message.
By moncanzuba, January 15, 2010 @ 5:40 pm
Dear Mr. Glaser,
First of all, let me THANK YOU for the privilege of being here, sharing the most enligtheing experience I’ve ever had. Your generosity at sharing your own life experiences with us is inspiring and I for myself don’t think that you are preaching at all but S H A R I N G. That really amazes me.
Your words about learning from failure reminded me a Barry Manilow’s song called “God Bless The Other Ninety nine” and regarding to that we have a lot to learn from our children brought to mi mind another song: Whitney Houston’s “The Greatest Love Of All” …
What a pleasure to be here, always learning, and sharing. Thanks a lot from the bottom of my heart.
Love.
Monica (from Argentina)
By Saskia, January 15, 2010 @ 5:41 pm
P.S. (from my commet above Hilda’s;
My real name is Amy. I am Christine’s daughter.
I find it amazing that my Mam is a fan, her Mam was a fan, and my Mam’s Mam was also a fan, as am I, of you. That is four generations!
That must make you feel quite special…and rather old
Best wishes.
Amy. (Saskia)
By moncanzuba, January 15, 2010 @ 5:46 pm
Correction:
“… brought to MY mind …” (not to mi – that was my spanish playing with my writing *lol*)
Monica. (big *g* here)
By PamT, January 15, 2010 @ 6:25 pm
“Perhaps what I have learned and what I study is not as easy to share as I had hoped.”
Can I speak as someone who feels she has connected strongly with many of your words but who has been confused by some others here and there?
In common with a few other posters, I think I may sometimes respond, and maybe on occasion challenge, whilst I’m still in the process of ‘working things out in my head’ and perhaps that’s a mistake. Why I might sometimes feel the need to challenge, rather than simply asking a question or thinking it over myself, perhaps says something about my mind wanting to try and assert some degree of control. As a recovering control freak, it wouldn’t come as a huge surprise! What I can say with certainty is that you plant the seeds of thought. Whilst I was out walking my dog yesterday, the faintest glimmer of understanding unexpectedly dropped into my thoughts out of nowhere over an obstacle I’d been struggling with for a while – from something that you’d written. That tends to be how it works with me. So, what I’m trying to communicate, in a somewhat long-winded manner, is that sometimes it may be a matter of gradual absorption rather than an expressed ‘Eureka’ moment.
On the matter of the phenomenon of celebrity, all its connotations and yours in particular, I could write reams. But I think it might be more of a cathartic exercise for me, rather than adding any particular value at this point. What I’ll settle for is to say that, at the very least, the respect and honour I feel you and your shared thoughts deserve, is the recognition of their implicit value and, if I respond, trying to do so with honesty and integrity. BTW, I’m not implying that others don’t do this. There are a whole host of genuine heartfelt postings on this blog; this is my personal reflection.
Kind wishes.
PamT
By xtexan86, January 15, 2010 @ 9:53 pm
PMG,
Thanks for your post and for sharing the memory of ‘meeting a celebrity’ moment. I met Garth Brooks once while working security at a concert. Two friends had asked me to try and get his autograph. After the show, I went up to him in the underground hallway by the dressing rooms and sheepishly explained my request. While doing so, he put his arm around me and giving me a great hug, said he’d see to it and asked if there were any others who wanted one. A short time later, one of his staff found me and handed over about half a dozen personally signed 8×10 photos! Not only that, but before leaving Garth saw me and asked if I’d gotten the photos. I really wasn’t a fan of his until that night, when not only did I get something unexpected, I saw the ‘humanity’ of a star who could’ve very well dismissed me as a bothersome fan.
My point is, for some fans, this is all they need from their ‘idols’, an affirmation of mutual respect, ie., I’m a human and you’re a human. I wonder if you felt you sold yourself short when meeting your idol (by not saying something and just turning away) as you had certainly earned the right to be there in the company of fellow actors.
Which brings up the question of the day…Is getting or wanting an star’s autograph so much as wanting a ‘piece’ of them, or just the affirmation that they’re NOT a god – a human that appreciates the compliment and is willing to offer a small token of ‘thanks’ to the fans?
And to PamT – I definitely agree with your statement “sometimes it may be a matter of gradual absorption rather than an expressed ‘Eureka’ moment.” Exactly.
And what a sweet comment by ‘Amy’! To me, this defines the fruit of your and David’s (Tony and Bernie’s too) labors. Creating a show that still remains alive and is impacting four generations now. Seriously, how many other TV series can boast of a fandom like S&H can?
Peace.
By singpraise65, January 15, 2010 @ 10:12 pm
Dear Mr Glaser,
My name is Tammy & I am 44. I always loved to watch you on “Starsky & Hutch”. I now have an 11 year old son, Luke, who has recently discovered that he also loves to watch that show. We decided to do a search on the internet for you & thats what has brought me to your blog. I want to thank you for allowing me to share some of my thoughts with you.
For a few years I have been praying for God to reach out to those in Hollywood & save them from destruction. I have spoken to others about the “celebrities” needing our prayers but haven’t had very much response. As you said earlier so many people do not see celebrities as real people & that is so sad. I have a heart for people & when I see or hear someone hurting I have a strong sense of compassion for them. I ask God to help me see people through His eyes & I believe that He does. I, too, have had a lot of emotional pain & loss in my life but through the hope of Jesus Christ I continue to overcome. You see, I believe that without His strength I would not stand a chance in this world so filled with evil. Jesus said (before he went to the cross) that He was leaving us His peace (John 14:27) & I have to call on that peace on a daily basis. My prayer for you is that you would find the “peace of God that passeth all understanding” (Philippians 4:7)to live out your days on this earth & that you would experience God’s Love for you in a way like you’ve never known before.
I look forward to more conversations with you.
God Bless!
Tammy
By mechelle, January 16, 2010 @ 12:08 am
Wow. I have only appreciation for you and your willingness to share your opinions, feelings, experience, and orientations. I appreciate your time and energy. I feel the hurt behind your latest words. The other side of compassion is an openness that also leaves you vulnerable.
Celebrity, part 1:
I met Gwendolyn Brooks when I was in high school. I dragged my father and younger sister along to her lecture at the local college. I had a list of questions and accolades. But as I stood before Gwendolyn, all I could do was stare and stammer. My sister made an impromptu speech and showed Gwendolyn my list. Ms Brooks invited me to the dinner in her honor that night. I sat at her table. I’m sure I spoke. I’m sure I ate. But all I can remember is wanting to be able to express what her work meant to me, how it formed me.
Celebrity, part 2:
So, my other passion was theater. Every aspect was intriguing- down to hair and makeup. But of course the interaction between the cast members was the most intoxicating. Ah, the feeling of looking into another’s eyes and communicating as myself and as someone else. Your work entered my life and I have been magnetized and delighted by it.
I admire you and am intrigued by your life journey, your grace, and your work.
As I stumble along, trying to find my way, your words and the words of those to whom I am connected through your site and blog comfort and spur me.
I will trudge through the rain in the morning to sit and walk and breathe. I’ll call my sons to tell them that I love them. I will try to be open.
Thank you. Take care. Be good to yourself.
By helly19619, January 16, 2010 @ 12:28 am
I have to say I agree wholeheartedly with your blog. I can honestly say a couple of years ago I went to a moms weekend at my daughters college and we were asked to share secrets. One of my secrets was that I would give up my fantastic marriage for one night with you. But I thought it was interesting that I put a note at the bottom that said this only applies if he looks like he did in 1976. Our fantasies are very strong and profound. To be honest, they are best left unsaid and unexplored. Trust me.
However, I believe fantasies are fun and healthy.Our secret mental get away. .
By litewrkr, January 16, 2010 @ 3:20 am
Dear Paul,
From somewhere in the deep unconscious remembering of my innocence, I knew there was a purpose to my life – how and why my experiences manifested in the way they did. I knew there were reasons why people behaved as they did towards me. I knew there was a reason I reacted the way I did in everyday situations. I knew there had to be a better way. I started to look for answers – I followed the pathways most seekers do, with many of the same results.
Finally, I came to understand that the greatest gift we can share with another is through allowing the other to share in the reflection of our essential Beingness – to share with “other” a glimpse of what is their potential, to allow them to see that to which their eyes may be closed, because the mind cannot grasp that which it cannot visualize or conceptualize.
One cannot open their Heart with their mind, but one can open their mind with their heart.
Thus, the true teacher cannot teach you anything but can only remind you of what on some level you already know.
I believe Love and Intimacy are ultimately based on understanding – the desire to understand, the need and the willingness to be understood. Vulnerability and trust are integral. It is most helpful to realize that every person who comes into your life and pushes your buttons is showing you something about yourself. An experience of negativity can be instructive in that it shows how powerful our thoughts are, how they shape our outlook on life and the possibilities we entertain, how they can limit or broaden our horizons. Thoughts generate our actions; they inspire us, and ignite the imagination to see things we haven’t seen before.
The bottom line is that negativity stems from unconsciousness. Therefore the remedy is its opposite. We all have some aspects of unconsciousness until we reach the final goal, which is the reason the universe came into existence. That goal is Self-Realization — the finite becoming infinite — the drop becoming the Ocean.
But there is a part of us all, a dark secret part, that doesn’t want to see the light of day, that doesn’t want to surrender its separate existence for the experience of infinite oneness. It is too scary. Fear is something that will always be a part of us; it is part of our human nature. Fear serves as a warning device, an alarm, to keep us from harm.
We all know that Darkness cannot exist in light; it has no existence except in the absence of light. Many are unaware that in the embrace of Light, it becomes Light. When you look at darkness, you see that it’s nothing (no-thing)—it’s just the absence of something…… Compassion…Love. To the degree that we approach that quality of perception is our capacity to feel the presence of the Infinite.
It’s like taking a tuning fork and hitting it forcefully against the edge of a desk. The pure sound will cause other tuning forks of the same pitch to start vibrating and making the same sound. That is a metaphor for holistic communication. That is holistic communication at its highest.
True Spirituality comes from knowing we are the Love we seek, that we are the Beloved, and we are the Act of Loving. The synergy of these three is, in Essence, the Transpersonal Self. As Rumi said, “I searched for God among the many teachers. Finally, I looked into my own heart and there I saw Him; He was nowhere else.
“Why should I seek? I am the same as
He. His essence speaks through me.
I have been looking for myself!”
Love is the essence behind Life, everything I do and everything I AM. I believe Love is a state of Being, the Transpersonal sharing and realization of the Consciousness of who you are, of daring to be the true expression of who you are, of daring to allow another to be the true expression of who they are, without judgment of Self or other, without your need or expectation of any outcome. You share that message and give Hope to all that read your words. I believe the opposite of fear is hope and Love is the result of merging hope with fear.
Tomorrow when I rise I will take my morning walk along the canal, think of the things you shared, embrace the rain as it turns my hair into long blonde noodles and breathe in life!! I will give thanks and be grateful. Thank you for your words of Love and Light, your willingness to be innocent and open with your feelings, reaching out to share, to teach us all that in order to learn to fly we must be willing to jump into the abyss.
Namaste,
Vicki
By lady800cc, January 16, 2010 @ 1:54 am
Hi PMG, Pam and Blog Fam,
I didn’t font anything about the subject of teaching our children in my post so I wanted to revisit and post what came to mind. I have two teenaged daughters with the oldest being in college. I was once a head counselor for pre-teens at a YMCA, and I taught the 7-9 year old Sunday school class at my church. I’ve also done one on one with a handicapped teen who was a victim of a grand-mal seizure as a child and tutored a blind classmate during my first year of college out of high school. As diverse and limited as my teaching experiences are, there many more avenues in which children are taught and so I do not profess to be any kind of expert here
Raising my daughters; my approach was to let them lead me to the path that I would then help to guide them in. Your kids speak to you through their gifts and talents; thereby letting you know exactly what they want to learn. My oldest gravitated towards music, so it was easy for me to guide her and yet let her be free to explore her own creativity. She is stuffed with so much talent that I am in awe. My youngest has so many different talents including music, but she loves fashion; in order to help and guide her, I feel I have a responsibility to educate myself about something I know nothing about. We are both learning so much together about this path and she will be better prepared because of it. I also felt and continue to feel that my girls need to know that I am flawed, that I have made mistakes and that I survived and that I am here in spite of me. I have a strong personality (so I’ve been told) and I didn’t want my kids to see this strong willed person who only spoke of her triumphs causing them to think they had to strive for some form of perfection. Innocence is very precious in this day and age and a parent fights some very large foes to allow their children to keep their innocence as long as possible. I mentioned before how my girls and I hung out in New Hope, Pa., how I raised them to enjoy the corny things in life. This was one of the mechanisms I used to allow my girls to be comfortable with their innocence and optimistic yet aware view of the world around them.
My experience with teaching other folks children was that they needed to be listened to and affirmed. I was known for giving every child an opportunity to shine despite their ability and I think that is important. Children are constantly compared, tested and measured where most of the time they just want to be. I found myself to be a much more productive teacher and my students much more productive learners when our boundaries were clearly defined. I also found that I really did need to be sensitive of the environment from which my students came because that is what shaped them and that is my starting canvas.
So sorry this was so long
Lady800cc
(Yeah I Ride!)
By anne, January 16, 2010 @ 4:52 am
cher Paul,
aujourd’hui j’écris en français, j’espère que vous me comprendrez… Mon anglais n’est pas assez bon, et je ne sais pas si la traduction internet est bonne.
Vous avez l’air un peu déçu de la réaction de certains… Ne vous rendez pas malade, tout le monde ne peut pas être d’accord…
Je suis désolée que certains ne comprennent pas vos pensées… Mais ce n’est pas grave. L’important c’est de pouvoir PARTAGER des idées, COMMUNIQUER, sans vouloir forcément CONVAINCRE l’autre, juste pouvoir dire ce que l’on ressent. Juste de la TOLERANCE…
Et c’est pour ça que j’aime lire votre blog, vous avez une belle philosophie de la vie je trouve. Et même si je ne comprends pas toujours tout, ou si je ne suis pas forcément d’accord avec tout. Souvent certaines de vos phrases me touchent en plein coeur, parfois non. Mais c’est ça qui est bien, pouvoir partager ses idées, ses émotions… Et ceux qui ne sont pas d’accord, ma foi, qu’ils disent leur opinion, mais tout en restant dans le RESPECT de l’autre. Je crois que c’est cela votre force, vous respectez les autres, vous AIMEZ les autres, et vous voulez leur faire partager votre expérience. Et Dieu sait qu’avec tout ce que vous avez vécu (de bon et de moins bon), vous avez largement de quoi nous parler. Et c’est très bien!!!
J’espère que vous pourrez me comprendre…
Paul, je vous souhaite du fond du coeur une très bonne année, avec vos proches, avec beaucoup d’AMOUR et de SANTE…
Continuez (si vous pouvez) à écrire de temps en temps. Vos textes, votre manière de penser, votre expérience de la vie peut réconforter certaines personnes, et c’est très bien!!! Après, pour ceux que ça ne touchent pas, tant pis, vous ne faite rien de mal… ;o)
Je vous souhaite le meilleur!!!
A très bientôt j’espère,
Anne (la maman française de 2 enfants, David et Nathan, ça faisait longtemps que je n’avais pas écrit, hihi)
By hilly, January 16, 2010 @ 9:15 am
I’m still reading and thinking about this blog but I have one small comment on your reaction to your celebrity – no OK two long-winded ones; that’s me…. wordy!
the first is that I have always noticed – right from the time when the ‘fanzines’ told us how much you and David disliked the ‘gravy train’; and when you even got a Sour Apple for not playing their silly games (that in m – you have always seemed to have the strength – no go on Hilly say it: the intelligence and the self-respect – to be yourself whether that pleased the image strokers and PR people or not; this in contrast with the celebrities who use a cause or a personal incident to get publicity for a new album/movie. Look at what is going on now, Haiti’s terrible earthquake has brought a wave of reaction from the cebritites I would class as sincere in their actions – a singer or Hitian origin; an actress who is also a Unicef ambassador. They are there because the cause needs them – no adopting a baby for the ‘kudos’ with the press to hide a failing marriage. Ok as you once pointed out even the M****s and the like bring what we could define as ‘collateral good’ with their insincere posing – but to me it is still worthless. what I’m trying to say here is that it is perfectly possible for a celebrity to keep his/her privacy…we only need to see the shock of the revelation of your family’s battle with AIDS for that – the first the world’s press got to hear of it was a year after your daughter died. Not for you the ‘look at my tragedy oh and by the way I’ve just directed a movie’ apporach.
Does that sound catty? perhaps. But it isn’t said enough. It is too easy for the latest singer with a flagging career to get drunk in public – fight for custody in public (shave her silly empty head OK meeeaow, I admit that was very catty) adopt a baby and then leave it int he hands of the nanny etc etc. I don’t hink I need to add to the list. But how sincere it is to fight with dignity and face the facts and also do what Elizabeth did with your support but without ‘cashing’ in on your name.
I didn’t cut an paste this BTW so I hope it making some sense.
Point 2…ummmmm give me a moment while I remember….oh yes. Still coming back to the concept of celebrity. I fell for a certain Russian revolutionary student in a movie (“Jewish Roots” hahahahaha) and I was overjoyed to see him zapping around in a daft car on prime time but I went beyond that – reading those very interviews that didn’t get into the mainstream press or the fanzines because well..it was Paul not Starsky, and it didn’t fit the PR thing to have you discussing your personal philosophy rather than which burrito filling you preferred! And that impression was reinforced when I bought the DVDs of the show and watched the interview with William Blinna and Joe Naar….one thing Blinn said stuck in my mind’s ear; he was talking about you, Paul, and his admiration for the actor…but also and here’s the bit I’ve been waffling on to get to… the man, the human being… that’s what I see here in these blogs and in your speeches and in those long ago interviews with Paul not Starsky. I see a ‘beeyooteefull’ mind!
(Ok and my friends know that I still think the body ain’t too bad either)
For those who might think Paul takes things too seriously all I can say is : if you didn’t see hook shake his booty – you can’t even begin to understand!
By hilly, January 16, 2010 @ 9:17 am
see I should have cut and pasted!
(that in m – you have always seemed to have the strength
lost a bit here….
that in many ways the real Paul was more like the some aspects of Hutch than he was like Starsky (meditation; ‘deep thoughts’ whatever!)
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 16, 2010 @ 12:02 pm
- Paul 30 years ago I always saw the series Starsky and Hutch what followed I liked his personage but through time empece to watch the human being so that its Howard Johnson for my son the reflection of its soul seems pretentious but one always Idealiza to the people is real but one Begins to be but observant account occurs who are you a human being like I with virtues and defects When I read their writings are as if outside a beautiful letter of a friend, one learns of the friendly and they of my each have their experiences in the life everything absolutely everything is for a personal growth I have learned in an age very early Repeto And to have love to the fellow and at the moment I am learning of my daughter Tries to give the best thing him of my or I occurred it? it is why it teaches every day to me and one must be ARRANGED to learn of the other this is really wonderful to be able to share your thoughts and mine so thanks for everything there are no chances there is causalities in the life everything has a paragraph that again thanks Paul friend mine and I love you like person until escribi a poetry Dedicated to your eyes ” Eyes azules” this in the forum of Facebook-I also looks for I shelter to say it of a form in the painting and the writing a fluid of my the art you see Every day something in our life is learned… I appreciate my affection and Liporace love-Hilda yet to you – GOD BLESSES to YOU AND to YOU IT CONTINUES Illuminating IN THIS WAY THAT IS the LIFE… THANKS, THANKS AND THANKS (it is the same previous commentary but in English cost of realising it obtains but it)Hilda Liporace -Argentina
By Terri, January 16, 2010 @ 1:46 pm
Hello Paul, I’ve just read your latest blog and I hope you don’t give up on us to fast. Your writing is so interesting to read. It makes me stop and do a lot thinking after I read something you wrote. Since you don’t waste time on the trivial it’s evenmore of a pleasure for me. I’m surrounded by people who have a lot to say about nothing. It’s like a “breathe of spring” when you sare your thoughts. It also has begun to help me understand a little of the man. We all love the actor but it is just your job. (one your wonderful at, by the way). I love your celebrity story. I have one, only one. It’s when I trucked myself to Sunderland for a long weekend. Every part of the expierience was great, your performance and presence especially. The people treated ME special and I sat next to the sweetest little boy at one of the performances. Of course, meeting you was the best, and I admire your patience with me. It began to show me the person you are. When I think back of those days I’m so glad that you were the person I most enjoyed watching perform because a lot of happy experiences in my life have come indirectly because of you and what you do. I thank you for that very much. Hopefully you will continue to share your lifes lessons and of course some of your past memories like the snowy nights. I’m sure there is so much more. Love and Happiness Always, Terri
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 16, 2010 @ 9:59 pm
DEAR PABLO I CANNOT STOP TO THINK ABOUT ITS SHARED THOUGHTS – ONE THINKS ABOUT HAVING 20 YEARS AND THE WISDOM OR THE APRENDISAJE OF NOW – BUT MY TO UNDERSTAND THE LIFE GOES STEP BY STEP ALWAYS WITH LESSONS WHEN HE IS YOUNG HAS IMPETUS THAT CAN ALL IT AND IS PASSING THE LIFE AND WE REALIZE THAT THE SAME LIFE IS TAMING TO US IS MOLDING AND WE SEE THE THINGS TO US OF ANOTHER WAY, ENJOYING THE SMALL THINGS THAT BEFORE THE PASABAMOS BY STOP A BLUE SKY A BRIZA APASIBLE THE GLANCE AND SMILE OF A BOY – BUT THERE ARE MOMENTS THAT ONE SAYS IS ENOUGH I DO NOT WANT TO UNDERGO MAS BUT IT IS STRONG MAS THE DESIRE TO CONTINUE LIVING AND TO ENJOY SMALL AND GREAT MOMENTS – THE LOVE, RESPECT .EL AFFECTION (ALL THE GOOD ONE) EVEN HAVING PROBLEMS AND DIFFICULTIES WHERE IT IS CONTINUED LEARNING TO LIVE – A THOUGHT MINE IS IF DAS LOVE RECIBIRAS LOVE AND IF DAS LOVE AND YOU DO NOT RECEIVE IT IS PROBLEM OF THE OTHER– THE LIFE TO TAUGHT TO ME (GREAT DOLORES AND SADNESSES) BUT ITSELF SIGNS MUCH IN THIS RACE THAT IS THE LIFE –I CONGRATULATE TO YOU OF HEART BY THIS BEAUTIFUL IDEA TO SHARE – THAT BEAUTIFUL WORD (TO SHARE) AND EVERYTHING WHAT REPRESENTS IN HER GOD BLESSES TO YOU GREATLY AND I SEGUIRE HOPING ONE OF YOUR THOUGHTS THANKS PABLO FOR EVERYTHING AM A BEAUTIFUL PERSON AND A GREAT HUMAN BEING, WITH YOUR DEFECTS AND YOUR VIRTUES, LIKE ALL –THE LOVE LIVES — WE LIVE THE LIFE THAT I GIVE GOD TO US, WHICH WE MUST LEARN IS AS TO LIVE IT – (PABLO IN VERY FEW THINGS I AM NOT IN AGREEMENT WITH YOU BUT IN THE MAJORITY IF)– PEACE— … HILDA LIPORACE
By michaela804, January 16, 2010 @ 10:02 pm
Hi again
I read this post then I went back to try to find the one that seemed to bother you so much. When I read what Lartes wrote it didn’t seem negative to me. Just confused. Nowdays we live in a very different world. When I was a child we knew the people in our neighborhoods. And people helped each other out. You had to be connected with your friends and neighbors cause we were all in this together. Now it seems the world is outgrowing the people in it. Everywhere you look soemone or something is telling you to focus on yourself first and other people if you get around to it. I think that was the thing Lartes might have been trying to get at. Not taking a poke at you because your a celebrity. I’d like to think we all appreciate the time you put into this blog. It isdn’t all about kissing up to the fans or promoting yourself or yor schedule. You think, share your thoughts, and encourage us all to think. Many of us just want to return the favor in our responses. We aren’t trying to be negative or take anything from yyou. We just want to share and offer you something new to think about too. And when I was reading that person’s response I started to wonder if maybe it is easy in this new world to forget how to have compassion for others. Maybe all of us get so caught up in what we think and why we think it that we lose track of what it is to care about other people or remember how to put their needs ahead of our own. For me I can see where it would be easy to get detached from other people in the process of focusing on the present. All the little niceties that used to make connecting and thinking about the person next to you are fading fast whether you are a celebrity or just a boring old nobody. So facing helplessness might be a very necessary tool in being able to keep things in day to day life in perspective. I’m not sure. I never thought much about it before. I can see though how it can be easy to take it too far and say “I’m helpless in the face of this problem, so why try” when what you are really saying is that you’re scared to try. What if you fail? What if you let somebody down when they need you or find out that you didn’t know the right thing to do? What if you try to make a difference and get sucked into somebody elses problems so far that you can’t deal with your own? What if you get into a situation and find yourself thinking how glad you are it’s happening to someone else and not you? How do you live with the guilt of feeling that way or the guilt of trying your best but failing anyway? When we come into contact with other people we face things that make us have to answer all those hard questions. So isn’t it natural to wonder if even the best philosofies leave us open to grabbing for that out that tells us it’s okay to hold back. It’s okay to step away from another person in pain. You can’t do anything abot it anyway, so just accept the fact your helpless, forgive yourself and move on. I can look at my own life and admit that I’ve done that and it seems to get easier and easier to do in modern life. Even when you want to be a good, caring person. The pace we live in, the hard times that are crusing so many people. It is too easy to become self-absorbed. With that in mind, I can understand the questions the guy asked and even find myself wondering the same thing, not just in terms of you personally, Paul, but every single one of us. We all have to look fear and helplessness in the eye at some point. And you’re right. You have to look at it honestly instead of letting yor pride or yor ego get in the way. But you also can’t hide from other people in the process. Nobody can do it all but we all must do what we can. We can comfort and share each others pain. We can step outside of our own doubts and fears to reach out in love. Maybe there will be times when we fail. Or the best we’ve got won’t be enough. Maybe we will come into contact with that one person out of a thousand who will take advantage or use us. And when it comes to death we can lose somebody we love even after you pour your heart nd all your hopes into keeping them with you just a little longer. After a certain age we all have felt the pain of that kind of loss. So maybe it is important to keep examining why we believe what we believe or act how we act to make sure we aren’t letting ourselves fall in the habit of becoming detached or apathetic. That’s just part of living and learning as we go. I hope I didn’t offend you Paul or misinterpret the other person”s thoughts too badly. It just seems to me that if life is a journey we all have something to teach and we all have something to learn from each other as we pass each other on that road. I hope I wasn’t out of line in saying so.
By Rach1970, January 16, 2010 @ 10:55 pm
Pam and Hilly – that sounds so fun and glad you that you all got to meet up! Oh and I would have enjoyed seeing Hook shake his booty!
Sharing is caring! That’s what Paul does and I appreciate his lovely words.
Rach
By Laertes, January 16, 2010 @ 11:08 pm
Thanks for jumping in and clarifying, michaela804. You might not have been right “on the money” but you came pretty close.
By xtexan86, January 16, 2010 @ 11:25 pm
Hey Hilly,
I only ask this because I know PMG won’t respond, but what IS his favorite buritto filling? (Enquiring minds want to know…)
By hilly, January 17, 2010 @ 1:45 am
xtexan ( ) I have no idea but I hope for his sake it’s a healthy one
Rach you just had to be there….if he didn’t know the effect that was going it have on some 40+ grown women scattered amongst the audience
he found out PDQ. As Fee pointed out to me – the kid sitting next to me was staring at us trying not to fall off our seats laughing!
so the question is….did he know?
Back to serious stuff…I agree michaela, you couldn’t have put it better
By Raffy, January 17, 2010 @ 3:10 am
IMHO I think that some are misunderstanding the meaning Paul gives to “powerlessness”.
He has been talking about powerlessness in the face of death, of our fear of it, and how being aware of it at a very deep level within ourselves can allow us, on the contrary, to find our heart and its capacity for love.
It seems to me instead that it has been perceived as our incapacity to reach out, as something we feel as a sense of helplessness stopping us or that we are unable to do anything to change things, or to find good motivations to move towards others, or to be afraid to do it because of whatever consequence it could bring.
In reality I think that the act of recognizing that powerlessness and the fear of it which dominates our lives, the one in face of death, that we all have in common and experience in many ways, more or less “visible” to us, can allow us to “know”, to penetrate that part of ourselves, our consciousness, something “beyond”… where our heart really is. A pure unconditional capacity for love, I think “free” even from that “need” to feel “together” and help each other, need that most times, if we look better, could come from our ego, in order to satisfy our sense of safety and appreciation.
Where we could find enough compassion to accept or “forgive” that human part of ourselves lost and afraid if not inside our consciousness, that space of our spirit connecting us to the Universe? When we feel it for sure we are “pushed” to reach out acting through unconditional love towards ourselves and others, able to take risks, to accept ours and others’ failures, seeing ours and others’ fears without judging them, and much more.
My humble opinion obviously….
Raffy
By fee, January 17, 2010 @ 3:35 am
Oh yes, that was a night to remember indeed!!!!! Indeed Pam it was fantastic to meet up with all of you. Hilly, you and I spent most the time holding each other we were laughing so much. I think too that Paul “did” know exactly the effect he had on us mad nutters! Brilliant performance by you Paul, and the rest of the cast.
Paul, you wrote about being “tongue tied” when you saw Cary Grant who was also one of my heroes btw. Funnily enough, when I was lucky enough that weekend to speak with you after your performance I didn’t feel “awestruck” or “starstruck” at all. You were so down to earth and friendly and easy to talk to and came across as a genuinely nice person.
Yes, I loved watching you and David way back then but it was just another tv show that I liked to watch. Since I found the internet myself a few years ago and discovered this website and read about your journey and how you dealt with the tragedy in your life my respect and admiration for you as a person not just as a celebrity increased immensely.
I really enjoy reading what you write and share with us even if I don’t always understand at first what you are trying to share. The penny usually drops later when I think about it.
It is a wise person who realises that one never stops learning as there is always something new to learn no matter how old we are. I must admit that I am not the sort of person who delves too deeply into why we are here etc. but usually just get on with what I am doing. That’s because I am half Yorkshire and half Scot which is a pretty practical and down to earth combination!!
I do try to think of others however and help where and when I can. Now I have to agree with Michaela too in what she says. Life has changed so much in the past 30 years and not always for the better either. Commonsense and taking responsibility for one’s own actions seem to be sadly lacking and it is very much a “ME” generation. Maybe it’s our age Paul as we were brought with the old set of values.
As for sense of community that has changed immensely too. We have only been in our current (and hopefully last!!) home for four years but have only been able to get to know a few of our neighbours and get on very well with those ones and we help each other out. There seems to be a great suspicion from newcomers who are usually from the city in even giving a smile and “gday” as we pass one another in the street. The older generation still do of course it’s the younger ones who are suspicious. Very sad! We live in a small township where there is still a sense of community spirit over all with the locals who have lived here for years.
It is so easy to give a smile and a hello when we pass each other in the street isn’t it.
Anyway, I have waffled on enough and just want to finish by echoing what Pam and others have said. Love, compassion and caring for each other is all important.
Be assured that we care deeply for you Paul as a person in your own right even though we don’t really “know” you as such.
love and hugs, Fee xxx
Ps Pam, give Paul a REALLY big hug from me as a thank you for all he has given us. I forgot to at Bromley.
By valerie, January 17, 2010 @ 6:25 am
Day thought :
“Life is to short to wake up in the morning with regrets
Believe that everything happens for a reason
If you get a chance, take it
Nobody said it would be easy
They just promised that it would be worth it”
Small sentence to be meditated :
“Here and now”
All
I wish you an excellent day
valerie
By StripedTomato, January 17, 2010 @ 9:09 am
This is kinda strange. I just got done watching old episodes of S&H and came here looking for the man behind Dave Starsky and instead found a human being called Paul. You are a fascinating man, sir. I think I can learn a lot from a person like yourself. Please keep writing, you have a captivated audience.
P.S After reading up on your Wikipedia entry, I had no idea you’d been through so much pain in your life. Being the youngest in my family, I am the type of person who has always needed the influence of others. Some of the influences I have chosen for myself have’nt always been good. I think your insights into life will be very useful to someone like me. Thankyou for sharing.
By hilly, January 17, 2010 @ 9:26 am
P.S After reading up on your Wikipedia entry, I had no idea you’d been through so much pain in your life.
doesn’t that just add to what I said about celebs choosing what the pubic knows about their private lives?
Pam I figured that Paul was not into junk food (I know a great sushi restaurant in Avignon if he ever comes this way LOL….)
By hilly, January 17, 2010 @ 9:28 am
for pubic read public
LOL my typing is getting worst…mind you that might have been a Freudian slip when you think of some of the celebs who splash their slightest move over the gossip pages!
By G, January 17, 2010 @ 10:39 am
I was listening to npr today, The Bob Edwards Show, and in the first hour they discussed Phyllis Kirk’s contribution to THIS I BELIEVE.
I think it’s right up your alley if you have time for a listen……….
Happy Sunday
Genevieve
By hilly, January 17, 2010 @ 11:55 am
Ps Pam, give Paul a REALLY big hug from me as a thank you for all he has given us. I forgot to at Bromley
you forgot Fee and I didn’t dare…….
By sagacity, January 17, 2010 @ 2:11 pm
P,
First of all, let me say that it took a great deal of courage for you to undertake a blog such as this one. It is not an easy thing to share one’s thoughts, feelings, and reactions with faceless strangers. Furthermore, to put yourself in the position of having your values and ideas publicly examined must be uncomfortable to say the least. For those reasons, I commend you for what you are attempting here and hope you are able to gain from is as much as you contribute.
It is not an easy thing to expose one’s values or beliefs to others, even under the best of circumstances. Add to that personal thoughts, ideals, and opinions, and the result is literally offering a piece of your deepest self to others for their scrutiny, evaluationa, or–in some cases–judgment. Frankly, I can see just how easy it would be, then, to interpret (or experience) any challenge to or rejection of those views as a rejection of you, yourself. Please, try not to take it that way. For the most part (as there will invariably be exceptions) others just wish to share a bit of themselves and their own beliefs, as well. To understand and be understood is a desire we all harbor; thus, I hope you will–rather than be discouraged–root out all those tidbits of fresh perspective necessary in keeping your own (perceptions)strong, sharp, and precisely honed.
By michaela804, January 17, 2010 @ 2:25 pm
Sagacity,
Well said. Opinions are indeed personal things. It is really easy to “take” a difference of opinion as a personal attack, especially when its about views or ideas which mean a great deal to us.
By Laertes, January 17, 2010 @ 3:46 pm
I agree, michaela. Years ago someone very special to me became critically ill. She had been fighting the smae condition for as long as I could remember and it was really hard to watch for those of us who loved her. Finally the day came when doctors told her it was all over. They told her she needed to go home and get things in order because there was nothing else they could do. It was devastating because she was a young person still. But she was worn out. We were all worn out. And some of us (like me) just couldn,t stand to see her suffering anymore. So we started telling her how important it was to face facts. I don’t know. Maybe we got it into our heads that she thought dying was something to be ashamed of. She had always been such a powerhouse. And like I said all of us around her took it hard. We wanted to make death as easy and comfortable for her as we could and just couldn’t understand why she kept on fighting us.
Well, she lived and is still alive and raising cane today.
Years later she told me how it had felt to her that we all wanted her to die. We thought we were giving comfort but she felt like we were writing her off. It took her a long time to get past it. She wasn’t angry. She was more hurt and confused. Disappointed. Like she didn’t mean that much to us if we were so quick to give up on her. And at first I was offended. Where did she get off being mad at me for just trying to giver her some peace of mind. How could she be mad at us for not being able to see into some cristal ball and know the future? And how could she accuse us of not loving her and actually wanting her dead and out of the way, like she was some kind of bother?
Then I cooled down just enough to think abuot what she said. And I had to admit there was some truth in it. I had allready lost two other close friends out of the blue and had never let myself grieve. I felt guilty over not being able to save them. Guilty because my life went on. Angry because I felt robbed and on and on and on. In that place and time it was easy to give myself over to fatalism but say to myself it was realism because I had already gone throug the wringer so I really wasn’t ready to go through it all over again. I guess that’s why when this friend seemed like she was going to leave too, I guess something in me did shut down. And iut wasn’t a fear of helplessness or a fear of death or a fear of helplessness in the face of death. I was just really drained mentally and emotionally. Too much death, too muh dying, too much loss. So I went on autopilot and didn’t let mysekf FEEL. Just get it over with! That’s what I wanted. And I had to admit that attitud e was just as much about me as about her. She was right. It was selfish. But not malicious. As human beings we get worn out, hurt, depressed, worn down, or whatever and go into self preservation mode. We’ve got to survive a thing we don’t think we can survive so we do whtever it takes to get through it with some kind of sanity. I don,t know. At the time it’s hard to see it but later on when all the prtssure is gone and emotions aren’t running so high, we do have to step back and separate what we were really thinking and feeling from the stuff we were telling ourselves just to get through the pain. And I was glad she stepped up, looked me right in the eye, and called me on it. Some of it hurt. Some of it made me mad. Some of it I could say, “well that wasn’t what was going on,” and listen to her while she told me how certain things affected her in ways I never even suspected. But that’s ther purpose of sharing. Thats what happens when you open these thing up. You learn. Sometimes all you learn is why you believe what you believer in the first place. But you learn. Your not trying to be negative or attack anybody. You just care enough to want to understand where their coming from and maybe gi e them the chance to hear where you’re coming from so that everybody wins. Everybody grows a little bit. Everybody has the chance to learn something new.
I hope its alright to think that way. I mean I don’t mean any harm by it but if it really offends people, you respect that and move on. That’s just part of us all living here together on this one same Earth.
By PamT, January 17, 2010 @ 4:41 pm
Whilst differing opinions (& misinterpretations) must undoubtedly be both frustrating and discouraging, my feeling is that Paul is more than capable of withstanding them without regarding them as personal attacks. What must be much more difficult is when his motivation for sharing his thoughts is called into question in such a way that flies in the face of his personal philosophy. Just my thoughts.
PamT
By helly19619, January 17, 2010 @ 6:23 pm
But does he like chocolate? Gotta love the chocolate! Chocolate is a healthy food right? Just kidding, just wanted to give some more humor to this thread.
By Rach1970, January 17, 2010 @ 6:30 pm
LOL Helly Great post! Chocolate is a good topic and I don’t know about anyone else, but I enjoy it. Well actually dark chocolate is the healthier choice, but the milk chocolate is tastier.*g* I think laughter is a great medicine!
By Sarah Levy, January 17, 2010 @ 6:53 pm
Hello Paul and to everyone else who reads this blog. This is the first time I have commented on any of the posts or comments here. However, I have enjoyed reading every ones thoughts on the topics that so far have come up.
On the subject of Celebrity and how we build Celebrities up in our minds to be the person we want them to be, I wanted to add my own thoughts on that.
For many of us, we do not live within a tight knit community the way our grandparents did. Most of us in the Western world, are not part of an extended family. I often wonder if this is the reason why so many of us look elsewhere for our role models. Where we once looked to a community member for inspiration and maybe gave them our admiration, we now do it to Celebrities. We are blessed with imaginations that know no boundaries, so as well as admiring a person, we can also build them up to be whatever kind of person we want them to be.
I also believe that many fans want some kind of connection to their object of admiration because they want to convey to that person just how much they have influenced their lives. We want to be able to say, “you changed my life”, or, “you helped me through a difficult time”. If the person we admire so greatly is a family member, or community member, we would probably tell them, face to face, what a positive effect they have had on our life, so I guess, fans want to be able to do the same for the Celebrities.
I believe that admiring and liking a celebrity can have a positive effect on a person’s life. However, a balance needs to be struck and we need to be aware that everyone has flaws as well as attributes. Our own flaws and attributes help to make us different to the next person. To build a person up in own minds and then complain when that person doesn’t live up to the expectations of our own imaginations is unfair on the celebrity.
Paul, I hope you are able to find the time to continue with the blogs. Not only have they been very thought provoking but they have also brought up other interesting topics along the way.
Best wishes,
Sarah.
By macthedog, January 17, 2010 @ 9:30 pm
Hello PMG –
I’m surprised to find myself posting here but I am so loving this blog. Thank you very much Paul, for sharing your thoughts with us in this forum. It’s a thrill to see such lively and open conversation about stuff that truly matters. Many of the posts here, beautiful and heartfelt, have resonated deeply with me.
Sharing with love and kindness, the things one has learned is a beautiful gift.
Like the heart and lungs must work together to sustain our physical life – Love together with Wisdom or … Good with Truth … Knowledge and the Will to do something good with it … etc. – work together to bring us into a deeper, more spiritual life. I believe we need both these elements happening to make us whole … and … achieving this ever more fully, seems to be a lifetime process with many layers. (No fast-food here I guess!)
Anyway, I just feel like this blog is ‘heat and light’ that is, love together with wisdom. So, thanks again for sharing part of your journey with us here in these ‘pages’.
And …celebrity aside… your light shines bright and beautiful. Certainly you have much of value to share so … shine on!
Warm Regards
Deborah
By xtexan86, January 17, 2010 @ 9:44 pm
Me again.
Hmmm, I’m not that crazy about sushi, but Thai, that’s MY favorite!
So here’s an offer. I’ll buy lunch, you can tell me what you don’t like about being a celebrity and I’ll confess that the rear sway bar on my Torino does absolutely nothing to control sway and I’ll forgive you for driving the TV cars into every curb, pothole and bulldozer that you could find. Deal?
Peace.
By Rike, January 18, 2010 @ 12:49 am
@Laertes – read your post and had tears in my eyes…
I know so well about your feelings – the struggling, the denying, the shutting down… even though my own experiences are quite different.
When my Dad suffered from cancer I hoped for so long he would make it through. Since my parents divorced when I was little I had only a little contact to him and for some years no contact at all. So to me the thought of loosing him – again and for ever – was almost unbearable.
But within these three years and his ‘fight’ I’ve learned a lot from him. They way he dealt with his demons, that he always told me life is beautiful changed something. He once told me that when he has to leave this world he’s in peace with it. He did what he wanted to do with his life. There had been regrets of course, but over all it was like he wanted to live (I’m not at that point right now, but working hard on it).
You wrote: “ I was just really drained mentally and emotionally. Too much death, too much dying, too much loss. So I went on autopilot and didn’t let myself FEEL. Just get it over with! That’s what I wanted. And I had to admit that attitude was just as much about me as about her.” The last few days my Dad didn’t regain consciousness. And for three years I’ve been through all with him… I even shaved my hair for him so we both had been bold. I wanted to show him how much I loved him, wanted to give support – even with a stupid thing of getting rid of my hair. To him it wasn’t stupid at all, he was proud and loved the photos that someone took of us… but it was stupid to a lot of people I thought I knew. Maybe this hair shaving thing was an act because I felt helpless – not knowing how to support him. And in the end it turned out it was indeed something that he loved and that he felt cherished. But to get to my point: these last days with him did cost me so much. I wanted him to live – and yet I wanted him to die. The situation was different to the situation of your friend – but still, I fought with my emotions and was, like you, drained out. Five weeks before my Mom and my stepdad had a severe car accident, they almost had been killed. In these weeks I had to take care of all of them, three different hospitals, miles apart… I still don’t know how I managed all of it. But I now know how much one can take and how strong I can be.
I felt guilty, wishing him to die. I’ve never had so mixed emotions… and even though I know there had been no chance for him to live I feel guilty sometimes… because his death was a relief – not only for him, for me too. I felt and feel selfish – my mind knows I don’t have to, but my heart sometimes speaks louder.
I try to tell myself that’s human – we are no machines, no computers. We are weak sometimes and each and every decision we make can be wrong. But, as you said, we’re able to learn, as long as we are willing to, as long as we open up ourselves for others.
Sorry for rambling… I’ve read so many personal insights in this block – it makes me feel to have found kindred spirits here.
Thanks for reading…
Regards from Germany
Rike
PS – I hope it is okay to add a link to a page where I wrote about my Dad…
http://www.jpgmag.com/stories/12057
By barb, January 18, 2010 @ 1:07 am
Paul, You are a warm compassionate person who wants to share your thoughts to everyone. I have learn a lot about my outer body experience. I had what is called astral plane were your soul travels to another plane of spirit. I went on a cruise to meet up with fans of Dirk Benedict. I have learn for him about his views on food and philosophy of eastern way of thinking. My own ideas of eastern and western philosophy is taken a view of everything has a order in the world. I have learn for you to live in the moment and focus on the here and now. To open ones mind to share thoughts is a gift of a special person. I like to share a poem I wrote on the cruise, it is called Sailing Into The Unknown
As one sails into the unknown
One finds the strength to face the fear
One finds ones true self in the adventure
along the way
See the fun in everything around you, not
the fear of the unknown but to embrace it.
This the second time I share this poem with anyone. The first time was on the cruise . I was on a stage. I was scare to speak but I did everyone in the room liked it. I write to express what I am feeling or what is happening in my life at that time. Just keeping writing on your blog, it helps other to find their voice and express their thoughts with everyone. I would like to think this world is a better place with teachers and sharing thoughts with everyone. I have a son who is a caring person. I think our children are the future of this world. We teach them to care for others and this planet we live on. My father has pass away a few years ago but I still talk to him everyday. I think my dad is laughing at me for the silly things I do. Have a nice day with all my love Barbara
By lady800cc, January 18, 2010 @ 10:55 am
xtexan86,
My kind of humor!! Hope our paths cross one day.
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 18, 2010 @ 11:44 am
SIMPLEMENTE ,¡¡¡GRACIAS ¡¡¡
DIOS TE BENDIGA
HILDA LIPORACE
DE ARGENTINA
By hilly, January 18, 2010 @ 12:44 pm
chocolate….now there’s a subject for deep thought and consideration.
And it is full of magnesium to keep our brains in top form.
I make great orange nut and chilli chocolate chunk cookies…..
By hilly, January 18, 2010 @ 12:46 pm
Hey XT you buy him Thai and I’ll buy him Sushi (and I promise not to do a parking brake turn when leaving the restaurant!)Even my little Twingo that has no rear end can lose it if you do that!
By helly19619, January 18, 2010 @ 2:25 pm
Did everyone go out and volunteer today for MLK’s day? We put gardens in our school. I hope stays looking this nice! Go volunteer it’s not too late!!
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 18, 2010 @ 2:37 pm
THANKS MR. GLASER .SIEMPRE I AM IN HIS PAGE WEB AND I PLACE AN ANNOUNCEMENT THAT ESTARIA IN FACEBOOK AND I WAS THERE SO THANKS TO YOU I HAVE MANY FRIENDLY TO SHARE MY THOUGHTS… IT BLESSES IT TO GOD HILDA LIPORACE –ARGENTINA–
By Rach1970, January 18, 2010 @ 2:53 pm
Can never ever get enough chocolate! This is worthy of it’s own thread. lol jk.
By Josie, January 18, 2010 @ 6:17 pm
Well, Mr Glaser always inspired me.
I mean, one set of things and factors always inspired me.
You see, I started Judo inspired in S&H.
It’s amazing the thoughts that I read here look like with what I learned and learn from my judo’s master. Are meant for competitions, but can be used for life, why not?
Came back to study English because I want to understand what Mr Glaser wrote and read his books and much more.
I think, share thoughts, brings a huge personal growth.
Since that I started looking for about Paul, David, Antonio or Hamilton I have met wonderful people.
Helped me lot sharing thoughts, when I needed courage for a surgery.
All this only brought me growth
Mr Glaser is a very intelligent man, and he is sharing a bit this with everybody.
I know, how more I know Mr Glaser, most admire him.
All The Best.
Josie.
By xtexan86, January 18, 2010 @ 10:10 pm
Hill,
I’m trying to pull myself away from those ‘orange nut and chili chocolate chunk cookies.’ Chili? Hmmmm, can a French fangirl make good chili? Send me the recipe, you’ve got my taste buds going nuts!
And yeah, you should drive your ‘Twingo’ or whatever that is…Paul would never get within ten feet of a Torino.
Oh, I have a better idea. Let’s snag Pam M, take HER to lunch and get her good and drunk. For good measure, we’ll bring tons of chocolate. She’ll tell us everything we want to know! xt
(Pam – we know you’d never do anything like that…or would she?????)
By valerie, January 18, 2010 @ 11:23 pm
That’s a very good idea Hilly for the chocolat !!! (lol)
je suis partante….
Xtexan, sorry I don’t know chili, but I love chocolat cakes (lol) (lol)
Have a nice day
By Softly, January 19, 2010 @ 1:48 am
Dear Mr. Glaser,
I thought long and hard if I would blog here again, but I’ve got this insatiable need to get to the bottom of things, so here I am.
I thought of why I came here, I must admit, it all started out as a sentimental journey, but it quickly turned into a journey that sparked all kinds of creative things. New thought got connected with old, unfinished ones, Old writings got finished and others got a good dusting off and are now in the, still slow, process of growing and forming. Veils are lifted and light hits places that were dark for a long time. Canvasses that got stuck on me get ripped to shreds and some shields I’ve used are melting away in new found compassion. There is a new energy in me that I like and embrace. Mind you, it’s not just this blog that made this change possible; there are a lot of things happening in my live that steered me in this direction.
This outburst of energy, changes, loud thoughts and soft feelings have nothing to do with me perceiving you as a preacher, a star or someone that has all the answers. I don’t take yours or anyone else’s word as gospel. See I am not very good devotee material. I don’t want to know you shoe size or your favorite food. But I do love to learn and like you’ve said, what you share does somehow resonate in me.
On my journey I found this to be true: If something resonates within, you had better pay attention, be quiet and listen. It might not be what you want to hear, but if it strikes a chord in you it is probably what you needed to hear.
Anything at any time can make something in you resonate, a conversation you happen to overhear while stepping of the bus, a child calling for its mother in a certain way, a sunset, a photograph, the way two people share a look, a piece of music, a blog by someone you don’t know or a one legged seagull. Anything at any time can shake your core and make you change, learn and see for the first time. I this marvelous world there is nothing we can take for granted and everything is anew all the time.
I realize all too well that we come from very different worlds. Were you can stand in front of hundreds of strangers, I shy away from talking to even one. Where you can shape the energy of a group of people into a film, I feel more comfortable with shaping wax into a sculpture. Where you willingly or unwillingly are wearing the canvas of celebrity, I willingly and unwillingly wear the canvas of fan. We both should try to look past these canvasses.
If I seem too eager or too loud, I to would humbly ask you to try not to judge me or yourself, we’re still learning. I will stumble and I will fall, but I will learn. When I get confronted with your need to define me as angry, threatened or uncomfortable, I must confess, I do get hurt… It’s okay though, I will bow and say thank you, because it’s all part of learning.
I recently saw an interview with you on unscripted. There you talk about telling stories and how when a story begins with “once upon a time” the character in that story doesn’t begin then, we come in to that story, the character already excised long before the story begins. Same happens when we meet in this blog, we all have a past and a story and the basic need to share our story. In the same interview you tell of a Mel Brooks story of two Bedouin tribes meeting for the first time, and when they get past the fact they are not there to kill each other, and some basic hand signals they sit around the fire and start telling stories: “you have a wife…, well let me tell you about my wife” Well here in this blog we say, “you have a live,… well let me tell you about my live…
Let us just hope that we understand each other’s “hand signals” and have the acute awareness to know when we don’t understand and the bravery to ask: “do I get it right”, or “please explain further “
I’m a little confused though about the intention with which you have started this blog. Are we supposed to come and join you by the fire, share our stories and grow together or are we supposed to step away from the fire and watch you grow from a distance. Both are fine by me.
I trust that none of us is here on this blog to harm or hinder another purposely; it’s hard enough to open up and learn without the fear of that. What makes it even harder is that all these entries are monologues, but this unfortunately is the nature of the blog. It’s in the monologues that we learn about the other, but it is informational at best. Only in the dialog can we really start to understand the other and ourselves.
For now I remain here, a little scared, full of doubt and questions but still learning,
Softly
By valerie, January 19, 2010 @ 3:53 am
sorry Pam,
yes indeed…
By disappointed_miss, January 19, 2010 @ 7:25 am
Softly,
To be frank, I stumbled upon this site by accident. I was working on an English paper at 4a.m. And (in a coffee-induced burst of silliness) began playing around with Google. I logged in to countless sites for “laughs” (finding it hilarious how many pages were completely at odds with the titles given them); yet this one captured my imagination. It struck me a pure and honest, totally unique. The ideas I encountered when I clicked on to the site, however, really led me to think. Unlike most of you, I am no a devoted fan of Paul Michael Glaser. In fact I only researched the man after I found his blog so different from the norm.(He and his work came waaaay before my time, it seems!) My interest was strictly in the concepts he put forth. Honestly, I can’t agree with him on some points; on others I concur wholeheartedly; some I must contemplate more; and others I just can’t comprehend. The fascination, nevertheless, was in the exposure to a totally new point of view. It challenged me to expand my spiritual and emotional horizons in order to seek, to learn that which lingered beyond my current understanding.
No, I’m not a big “blogger.” In reading, I never before felt the need to contribute (and probably never will again.) Yet when the topic “Reactions” was posted, I have to admit I came away with questions much similar to yours. Truthfully, I was devastated. It seemed to me that everything I found fresh and enlightening about this site had been shattered in a few paragraphs. Then I thought about it: there are many different connotations to that word “share.” Sometimes, one offers to “share” when he has something you lack and vice versa so that both parties are able to enjoy a portion of each. On other occasions, to ask another to “share” is to request a bit of “something” that he has which you lack and/or desire. Yet, in this case, in the case of this site, I concluded that “share” fell into the third category: “I have something I like [or value] that I want to give to you.” Make no mistake, that is fine…as long as the visitor to the blog understands this from the outset.
Perhaps the lesson learned is to read, prattle on about chocolate, recipes and sway bars, or (otherwise) keep our opinions and questions to ourselves.
By marly, January 19, 2010 @ 8:00 am
Dear Softly,
It’s so good and inspiring to read a comment like yours!
I must confess that ,when this “shared thoughts” blog started I wondered too about the intention behind it.You wrote:” Are we supposed to come and join you by the fire, share our stories and grow together or are we supposed to step away from the fire and watch you grow from a distance. Both are fine by me. “
This question(?) of yours made me questioning my own reasons and expectations concerning this Shared Thought blog.
By now I know for myself why I frequently visit this site(and occasionally even feel the need to put a word in,for what its worth…….)
As I already stated in an earlier post I see these thoughts/lessons of PMG as something I could gain from in my own life.At this point I’m still trying to find out to what extent this might be the case.Some of it absolutely appeals to me but being from another world / from another background than PMG with my very own “biography”I must find out for myself if I’m able to integrate the lessons he’s offering into my life.It would be so easy for me to back off and say,”This is too hard for me,I’m not that smart,I can’t do this!”Compassion for myself is my very first lesson to learn…..
This is going to take time though but it’s like you wrote,Softly,if something resonates within you,pay attention.
“Are we supposed to come and join in,share our stories,ect. or watch PMG grow from a distance.”
I guess it’s up to ourselves(just my personal view)What is our intention with being here on this blog?
PMG is giving me food for thought with his blogs and most of the time it’s enough for me to study these thoughts and,if possible,to use them . If I feel the need to share my thoughts and/or wish to contribute to what PMG or the other bloggers have to offer I’ll do so.
I do acknowledge the possibility that others might have different expectations from a blog like this and I respect that.
Softly, me reacting to your comment is because I felt the need to share my thoughts with you.
To consider your thoughts and by doing so reflecting on my own thoughts has been a meaningful experience.
I feel I can relate to you because I recognize the same need for self-reflection and the same eagerness to learn and to try to get to the bottom of things(although I often wish I could try a little less!).
I like your honesty and I thank you so much for offering me “food for thought” .
Don’t be scared.
With respect and kind regards,
Marly
By Laertes, January 19, 2010 @ 9:13 am
Softly (Disappointed Miss and Marly),
I hope it issn’t inappropriate for me to break in on this exchange, but I found myself asking the same questions. Being a natural-bor debater, I guess I came into this with that mentality. I have always asked questions, challenged, wanted to know the answers to everything. When little, I drove everyone crazy. And that I think is the glitch here. So many different people from so many different backgrounds and perspectives have been drawn to this site. Expectations will be different. Opinions will be different. I don’t know. I guess we all have to bear in mind that it is a relatively new site, so that maybe even PMG himself hasn’t had time to really figure out it’s purpose or objective. Didn’t he say it was more time consuming than he expected? Maybe it’s expecting more from him in other ways, too. I mean its hard to figure out the direction you plan to travel in when you first start a trip. Sometimes you encounter things that weren’t clear on the map (some good, some bad). Or construction. Road blocks. Accidents up ahead. Maybe then, in line with what Marly and Disappointed said in very different ways) it might be smart to resolve ourselves to responding honestly when the need takes us to do so but for the most part be prepared to just go along for the ride wherever it and PMG decides to take us.
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 19, 2010 @ 9:58 am
Law the last comentrios and my opinion is that there are no chances if causalities by something Mr. Glaser I realise blog, I am very believing in God and allows these things to heal the hearts chooses angels in the form of man (PMG) so that one can see its own falencias and profits for my Mr. Glaser is a very intelligent being knows very well so that I realise this blog sintio in its heart and when that fire in the heart feels who podra to stop it? this is wonderful so that we can interchange opinions and to learn of others is my humble opinion for this blog Mr. Glaser I remove the hat before you by its kindness and that never it stops listening to his heart BLESSES IT GREATLY to GOD AND THAT to GOD CONTINUES IT GUIDING IN THIS LIFE thank you very much TO SHARE AND TO LEARN OF the LIFE SAME Hilda Liporace of Argentina
By michaela804, January 19, 2010 @ 10:10 am
Pam,
Though I but skimmed your entry, I wanted to add this quick response. Your comment about the idea of “loving yourself” is bewildering to me, too. I have never understood it. I was taught that when you loved, that meant putting someone or something ABOVE yourself or your concerns. So, I can’t conseptualize putting myself above myself. And don’t think I want to. I do think there is something to be said about learning to LIKE yourself (as in “understanding yourself, “accepting” yourself flaws and all, “being patient” with yourself, “getting to know” yourself and that kind of thing.) For me the difference is that love is an action not a feeling, the way we can find ourselves treating it. Liking, on the other hand, is looking at something and focusing on the things that make us feel good or positive about a peron or a place or a thing (at least, I’ve always thought.) Maybe there are so many different reactions to “love” because so many people have so many different opinions of it!
By Raffy, January 19, 2010 @ 10:11 am
It is very difficult I think for ONE person, be it Paul or whatever person, to be always present and cultivate a “relationship” with EACH person on a blog, and especially this kind of blog, where every one has problems, questions, doubts, tragedies, confusion, thoughts …and feels the need to write them down often in such length and sometimes in a way I found not too respectful maybe…
The other thing is to understand if someone feels a subtle need to have PMG possibly get doubtful about his meditations. It could be a reality…because, if he did, the ego would have a chance to feel “recognized”. Sad to realize sometimes that it seems not enough to someone that he responds following his ideas and feelings…and after only one month of this blog. I don’t want to judge at all, just expressing an impression. However, this is his blog, he proposes his point of view and tries to respond to someone from it, as we all do. When people decide to participate in whatever meditation course, they didn’t expect to find there someone willing to change their own mind…also it would be someway negative and confusing. This is a blog of course, and the situation is different, I know. But for sure we should try to put ourselves in Paul’s shoes, if it is ever possible. What would we like to find here?…A friend, a teacher, a simple blogger? Personally I’m glad if I only can hear what Paul has to share, something which can feed my inner growth. And of course it is beautiful to widen my horizon even through all bloggers’ thoughts. Each of us keeps within a part of the “truth”. And I think we all are enriching Paul too.
Raffy
By Rach1970, January 19, 2010 @ 10:47 am
Pam – Thank you for your messages as I find them inspiring as well. I’m so glad this blog is not about ‘celebritizing’ or making /seeing/projecting him as a ‘’hero’’(as you said) and I’m grateful this blog is about sharing, caring and being helpful to all of us who are in this world together. I don’t want to judge his words I would rather learn and grow.
Paul – This blog is a gift and just keep on being you.
Rach
By Sarah Levy, January 19, 2010 @ 10:55 am
Michaela,
I found your post very interesting. The part that really caught my eye was the following;
“For me the difference is that love is an action not a feeling, the way we can find ourselves treating it. Liking, on the other hand, is looking at something and focusing on the things that make us feel good or positive about aperson or a place or a thing (at least, I’ve always thought.) Maybe there are so many different reactions to “love” because so many people have so many different opinions of it!”
My definition of love is very different from yours, but I believe that neither one is right or wrong. For me, many feelings are evoked from loving a person. However, those feelings can lead to actions. I also think it is possible to love people in different ways. I’ve often heard parents say that they would die for their children. I feel that way too. The love I have for my children is like no other love I have ever felt.
Thanks for posting your thoughts on love. It’s good to get someone else’s perspective on it.
Sarah.
By Terri Nefarious, January 19, 2010 @ 11:02 am
In response to the thread about the objective of this blog, I would just like to day this:
No matter what, it took a great deal of courage for this man(PMG) to make the decision to offer more than the traditional “fansite” blog (For example: “Paul likes sunsets, walks along the beach, very small puppies, and BIG HUGS….”). No matter what is said and done, PLEASE let’s not UNDERMINE that bravery by turning this site into THAT.
By Christine, January 19, 2010 @ 11:47 am
Just from a personal point of view, I see Paul as a truly inspirational man, who tries to make this world a more caring, compassionate place. I may not be as well educated or as ‘smart’ as some other’s, and sometimes I don’t quite ‘get’ the meaning behind the words but then after re-reading it through it will sink in! Paul is sharing with us his experiences in life, if that can help someone that is great. We all need to try to understand one another, and we will have different opinions but isn’t this better than doing nothing? I was brought up to have what they call ‘the old fashioned’ values. My late mother was the most caring, compassionate person who taught me to try to think of other’s before yourself, she did this and looking back I am so proud of her for having that attitude. It’s been 28 years since she died and still I try to be someone she would have been proud of. I love this blog, I look forward to learning more, and understanding more! You are doing a great job Paul thank you. Christine xx
By michaela804, January 19, 2010 @ 11:47 am
Sarah,
Thank you for your imput and your opinion. It is gratifying, to share an honest opinion and receive one in return. When people can agree to disagree yet continue to exchange their views, everyone involved seems to benefit. And that’s really neat.
Michaela
P.S.
To Terri Nefarious,
I’ve gotta admire your moxy. You said exactly what I was thinking several posts ago but was afraid to voice. (Maybe I wouldn’t ha e put it quite that way, but I have to hand it to you. You cut right to the chase!)
By sagacity, January 19, 2010 @ 12:00 pm
Dear Terri Nefarious & Michaela:
Here, here!!!!!!!
By PamT, January 19, 2010 @ 12:02 pm
Much as I appreciate some aspects of more recent posts, for those of us who truly value Paul being prepared to share his insight with us, may I humbly suggest that now might perhaps be a good time to actually focus on his words? I’ve just looked back on his earlier posts and responses; there is plenty of food for thought there.
PamT
By lady800cc, January 19, 2010 @ 12:18 pm
Love yourself:
I am a much better wife if I take care of my mind and spirit; if I except my limitations and seek to improve all of these; these actions propel this couple into a greater sense of happiness. I was taught that the order of things are: God, Self, Spouse, Children, Ministry/Vocation, etc., I cannot be useful to others if I am not (or work to be) whole in self. It is hard for my Husband to be happy at home if I am miserable about me; it is difficult for my children to be content if mom and dad are at odds; and putting my ministry before all of those will result in the breakdown of my family unit. To love one’s self can sound egotistical if it is perceived as a string of self-serving acts that no one can possibly benefit from; but the doctors and nurses who have taken steps to perfect their vocation are now better suited to provide help in Haiti and [your example here]….
I would font more, but I’ve been in training for two days and my brain is mush; so I hope the above makes sense.
By hilly, January 19, 2010 @ 12:18 pm
I’m still re-reading and meditating the original post on this blog and amazed at how many new windows open each time I think I’ve read it for the last time. To paraphrase Shakespeare ‘If words be the food of thought, prepare to think and digest.’
By hilly, January 19, 2010 @ 12:51 pm
Michaela, I would make a difference between self love (in the sense of putting yourself above others in your esteem) and “amour propre” which doesn’t entirely mean ‘self love’ (neither does it have anything to do with the translation of ‘propre’ as ‘clean’). It means the one thing without which none of us can really operate in this world….self respect. To respect someone you need to have a form of love for them – not infatuation or romance – but that combination of goodwill and friendship and compassion that is our love for one another. If you can not respect yourself, you can not love yourself and if you can’t love yourself you can not hope to go into this world without being constantly hurt and scared because if you can’t love yourself you can’t trust yourself and without trust…we have fear.
Without this self love you can not offer your friendship to someone else. When we say “you are my friend” we are not giving our friendship but receiving it; and when we say “I am your friend” we are giving our friendship…we are offering our support and our concern and our compassion to the other. We need our friends and our friends need us; we need to feel that we can turn to someone who has said “I’m your friend’ (lean on me…)” and to do that we need to trust them. Can we trust anyone that we can not respect? I don’t think so. Can we respect someone we do not trust? Maybe. Can we love someone we do not respect? Difficult. Can we love someone we don’t trust?….well that happens all too often when we let our emotional love overcome our intellectual capacity for love, let our hearts rule our minds.
Over the years of reading what Paul has said and seeing what he has done….looking at his recent speeches and blogs and at some of those interviews back in the 70s when he talked as himself and not ‘Starsky’ (there are 2 wonderful interviews with Merv Griffin available on the internet for example)..I noticed that from time to time he seemed unsure of himself. I’m not going to indulge in psychiatry 101 here…but it seems to me that Paul was constantly seeking to understand himself. (steps aside to say ‘hands up those who can truly say that they always understand themselves in the deepest meaning of the word’); in the jargon of the 70s to ‘find himself’. When we find ourselves we learn to love ourselves; to reinforce our self-trust and self-respect; and then we really learn to love ourselves. And if we can love ourselves then we can have compassion for ourselves; and reach out to that one person who can help us more than anyone else; that one friend we can not live without and without whose love we can not live in peace….ourselves
So we are all on this journey of discovery; hoping for the revelation of how to feel good and at ease with ourselves in order to interact with those around us. Sometimes we have to lake a choice and say ‘for my security I need to turn away from that person’; and that is a very hard thing to do too. If we let him/her into our circle why is it that suddenly we feel uncomfortable in his/her company….have we lost trust in that person or in our own judgment? When I feel I can no longer trust someone I feel uncomfortable with the idea of friendship with that person. And this brings us back to that need for ‘self love’….there are times when we wonder if we can trust our instincts; our choices…then what do we do if we don’t respect ourselves enough to take the next step forward in the journey to find that much needed self love.
and just sometimes…we need a little frivolity to mitigate the pressure of this search.
By Coelho Laurimar, January 19, 2010 @ 1:34 pm
Olá. Sou uma grande fã sua há mais de 30 anos e só agora consegui encontrar um canal de comunicação com você, Paul. Sinto-me feliz de poder realizar este sonho tão antigo. Eu não sei falar inglês, mas espero que possa traduzir o que escrevo agora e passar a você todo o carinho que muitos brasileiros como eu sentem por você.
I love you forever
Laurimar from Brazil
By xtexan86, January 19, 2010 @ 6:57 pm
A few thoughts again…
Hilly, thanks for your wonderful summation in one sentence what would have taken me a paragraph to say…”and just sometimes…we need a little frivolity to mitigate the pressure of this search.”
And if I may, Hilly and I know of each other because we are active members on another fan website group. As such, we are prone to spontaneous outbursts of chocolate and fangirl desires, among other things, so feel free to ignore our ramblings.
Personally, I don’t care what PMG has for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. The serious questions I ask, I’d love to have answered but that is up to him to decide whether or not he will respond. Either way, I respect his decision, but of course I’ll probably always press for that lunch date.;)
Softly, my questions would definitely mirror yours.
Disappointed miss, thank you for your thoughts on ‘sharing.’
And Pam M, I really appreciate your posts. Perhaps because you’ve known Paul for so long, you are able to provide some clarification to his thoughts and intentions.
Reading ‘thoughts’ or ‘ideas’ posted on the internet can be confusing at times as words, without intonation or facial cues, can be easily interpreted in various ways.
Peace.
By Josie, January 20, 2010 @ 2:53 am
Sure Pam.
Oftentimes we just need a word of support and encouragement.
I’m training to try to join a new judo competition, controlling my fear and not tried to erase it.
I hope have understood correctly.
Josie xx
By hilly, January 20, 2010 @ 12:50 pm
there is no question that intonation and facial cues, body language sets the ‘way’ and intent of dialogue,
so true Pam.
using italics>/i> or bold can help get your intonation across.
for those who haven’t tried it type without the spaces before what you want to italicise and close it with (without spaces) do the same with a ‘b’ if you want bold.
to get the idea of what intonation can do try this
Read the phrase below out loud, putting emphasis on the first word the first time and continue one emphasized word at a time until you have gone through every possibility (try to keep it even apart from the emphasis):
“I told you that we are going the wrong way.”
see the effect?
Personally when I read Paul’s blogs I hear his unmistakable, thoughtful (brown velvet) voice
By hilly, January 20, 2010 @ 12:51 pm
Ok that didn’t work.
the symbols for italics are
text
but all on one line of course!
By hilly, January 20, 2010 @ 12:51 pm
it still didn’t work – I give up….when I find the beginners site I’ll post the link (unless Pam can do it for you)
By Softly, January 20, 2010 @ 1:56 pm
Dear Marly,
Humbly and grateful I’ve read your response, …thanks, I needed that.
Thankful and a little less scared I give you my warmest regards.
Softly
By Softly, January 20, 2010 @ 2:00 pm
Dear Josie,
As one martial artist to another,…. Bow to your worthy opponent called fear, give it your biggest smiling technique and it will be ippon time and time again.
Gassho
Softly
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 20, 2010 @ 7:13 pm
HELLO AGAIN HERE – I WANT TO SHARE WHAT LAW TODAY – BUT THE TENDRAN THAT TO TRANSLATE I COULD NOT REALISE IT AS IT IS MY CUSTOM—-UN ACTO DE AMOR—- UN ANCIANO TODAS LAS MAÑANAS SALIA DE SU HOGAR HACIA EL PUEBLO LLEVANDO CARAMELOS DONDE LOS REPARTIA A LOS EMPLEADOS DE LOS NEGOCIOS Y ELLOS ESPERABAN ESE MOMENTO MAGICO -DESPUES DE DEJAR LAS GOLOSINAS SE ENCONTRO CON UNA ANCIANA QUE MENDIGABA Y LLORANDO DESCONSOLADAMENTE –¿QUE PASA AMIGA,POR QUE LLORAS -pregunto- ESTOY MUY TRISTE ,MI VIDA HA SIDO DURA Y NO TENGO MAS FUERZA PARA SEGUIR-CONTESTO ELLA.-EL LA MIRO A LOS OJOS Y LE DIJO -NO TE PREOCUPES NO TE LAMENTES DE TU SUERTE MIRA LO BUENO QUE HAS HECHO EN FAVOR DE LOS DEMAS.Y SI TE SIENTES DESCONSOLADA TOMA DE ESA TRISTEZA LA ENSEÑANZA QUE PUEDE OFRECERTE,DE SEGURO QUE ALGO POSITIVO OBTENDRAS.Y NO TE COMPARES CON LOS DEMAS .CADA SER HUMANO VIVE DE UN MODO DIFERENTE.CON POSIBILIDADES DIFERENTES ERES LO QUE ERES Y VALES MUCHO PARA TI MISMA Y PARA LOS QUE TE AMAN .HAZME CASO CREE EN TI .LA ANCIANA LE AGRADECIO -EL HOMBRE DIJO -VEN CONMIGO AYUDAME A ENTREGAR ESTOS CARAMELOS Y JUNTOS VEREMOS SONREIR A LA GENTE LO MAS HERMOSO QUE PODEMOS HACER POR LOS DEMAS REGALARLE UNA SONRISA.HAY TANTO QUE PODEMOS HACER POR LA GENTE NECESITADA SI TUVIERAMOS CONCIENCIA DE ELLO NUESTRO MUNDO SERIA MEJOR .ACUERDATE QUE LO MAS IMPORTANTE DEL VIVIR ES PODER AYUDAR CON LA SIMPLEZA DE LOS ACTOS QUE VIENEN DEL CORAZON.TOMADOS DE LA MANO EMPRENDIERON EL CAMINO A OTRO NEGOCIO PARA DAR ALEGRIA Y OBTENER UNA SONRISA DE LAS PERSONAS QUE VALORAN UN ACTO TAN SIMPLE COMO RECIBIR UN HUMILDE DULCE ——- ESPERO QUE LES GUSTE ¡¡ DIOS LOS BENDIGA A TODOS ¡¡ HILDA LIPORACE DE ARGENTINA —
By patricia, January 21, 2010 @ 4:06 am
I believe in a world were everyone is loved and respected no matter what colour their skin. Where none turns away from a the outstretched hand of a beggar on the streets, and where we hear the weeping of our fellow beings when they cross our path. I believe in universal love, uniting all people to one sacred union and rejecting war. This love is in our hearts – listen to it.
Patricia
By Laertes, January 21, 2010 @ 6:27 am
Patricia-
If only a portion of human kind believed as you did, what a glorious worle this would be.
By sagacity, January 21, 2010 @ 6:36 am
Such lovely sentiments, Patricia. The pure simplicity of love for human beings, one to another, has (I fear) gotten lost somehow. But, as was said, were we to rediscover that basic humanity in our hearts and souls, indeed: “what a glorious world this would be.”
By HILDA LIPRACE, January 21, 2010 @ 7:02 am
- – ACT OF LOVE OLD ALL THE MORNINGS SALIA OF HIS HOME TOWARDS TOWN TAKING CARAMELS WHERE THE REPARTIA TO THE EMPLOYEES OF THE BUSINESSES AND THEY WAITED FOR THAT MAGICAL MOMENT – LATER TO LEAVE THE TREATS ENCONTRO WITH A OLD ONE THAT BEGGED AND CRYING THEMSELVES VERY HEARTBROKENLY -THAT IT PASSES AMIGA, SO THAT YOU CRY – I ask I AM VERY SAD, MY LIFE HAS BEEN HARD AND I DO NOT HAVE MAS FORCE FOR SEGUIR-CONTESTO SHE. – I WATCH IT AT THE EYES AND IT SAID TO HIM – YOU DO NOT WORRY YOU DO NOT LAMENT YOURSELF OF YOUR LUCK WATCHES THE GOOD THING THAT YOU HAVE DONE IN FAVOR OF THE DEMAS.Y IF YOU FEEL LIKE HEARTBROKEN TAKING OF THAT SADNESS THE EDUCATION THAT CAN OFRECERTE, OF CERTAINLY SOMETHING POSITIVE OBTENDRAS.Y YOU DO NOT COMPARE YOURSELF WITH THE OTHER .CADA TO BE HUMAN LIVES ON A WAY DIFERENTE.CON DIFFERENT POSSIBILITIES YOU ARE WHAT YOU ARE AND BONDS FOR SAME YOU AND WHOM LOVE .HAZME MUCH CASE BELIEVES IN YOU OLD .LA TO YOU AGRADECIO – THE MAN SAID TO HIM – SEE WITH ME AYUDAME GIVE THESE CARAMELS AND TOGETHER WE WILL SEE SMILE TO PEOPLE THE BEAUTIFUL MAS WHICH WE CAN MAKE BY OTHERS GIVE A SONRISA.HAY TO HIM AS MUCH THAT WE CAN DO BY NEEDED PEOPLE IF TUVIERAMOS BRINGS BACK TO CONSCIOUSNESS OF IT OUR SERIOUS WORLD BETTER .ACUERDATE THAN THE IMPORTANT MAS OF LIVING IT IS TO BE ABLE TO HELP WITH THE SIMPLEZA OF THE ACTS THAT COME FROM THE CORAZON.TOMADOS OF THE HAND UNDERTOOK THE WAY TO ANOTHER BUSINESS TO GIVE JOY AND TO OBTAIN A SMILE OF THE PEOPLE WHO VALUE A AS SIMPLE ACT AS TO RECEIVE A HUMBLE CANDY – - – I HOPE THAT THEY LIKE IT BLESSES THEM TO GOD TO ALL HILDA LIPORACE OF ARGENTINA – I COULD TRANSLATE SO THAT IT THEY CAN READ ALL THANK YOU VERY MUCH
By michaela804, January 21, 2010 @ 7:27 am
There are times when I personally wonder if the pace and focus of this “new” world of our somehow strips us of our humanity. Everything is , “hurry, hurry, hurry! Don’t think about the person next to you. Don’t stop to help your neighbor no matter how seriously they need! You’d don’t have time. You don’t have time. You don’t have time.” Being able to empathize and care or put the needs of other people ahead of our own is wht puts us “above” the animals. Makes us human beings. There is a tremendous trust we receive when we are given that inner life force or soul to devolep and treasure and nurture. We are (I think) expected not to think of it as something to put higher than somebody else’s but a kind of inner light or beauty that we’re supposed to selflessly let shine out from us to brighten the lives of other persons with the belief that we won’t know darkness or lose out on anything really vital because everybody ekse aound us is expected to do the same thing. Because shing that light or giving love away is what we were put in this world to do. If the person next to you is suffering. Whether you see it right away or not you are too and so are the people dearest to you because we are all connected and all of our lives are connected. But when you open a book or a magazine, switch on your t.v. or a radio, all you hear really is “me, me, me, me, ME and why I have a right to focus so hard on me that I ignore everybody else.” People seem so scared to take responsibility for the “fee” we owe for being allowed to live in this world in the first place. Compassion, kindnessz, generosdity, concern, love, and so on. Like I said before. Some of us come from a completely different world and mindset. “Love yourself” is a real mystery to me. On the oter hand “respect yourself” does. You hold yourself to those standards Patricia mentioned because that is the only way to be the kind of person you can honestly respect, because if you can’t respect or value other peoples worth, you can’t respect yourself. If you cn’t respect yourself how can anybody respect or value you? And if you don’t have the respect of yourself or others how can you hold your head high and believe you have something positive to offer the world or the people around you or the ones you love most dearly? A lot is said about fear. What I see in the community (or lack of one) all around me is the fear of being overlooked or left alone. People seem terrified that if they give something of themselves they won’t get anything back or they will be left with nothing. Or left alone. Could that be the reason why the emphesis is usually on “self” and not other people as the extention of ones’ Self?
By Rach1970, January 21, 2010 @ 7:56 am
This world does need more people that will help one another and expect nothing in return. Life is busy and slowing down to appreciate it more is something we should all do. It takes practise and everything is about learning one step a time.
There is no perfect person and that’s why I don’t judge. I will contuine to try and be the change I want to see in this world, learning along the way.
Have a great day all, Rach
By Rike, January 21, 2010 @ 9:19 am
perfectly said Rach. I guess most people try to learn, try not to judge, but sometimes we forget… that’s human
*hugs*
Rike
By hilly, January 21, 2010 @ 9:34 am
There are times when I personally wonder if the pace and focus of this “new” world of our somehow strips us of our humanity. Everything is , “hurry, hurry, hurry! Don’t think about the person next to you. Don’t stop to help your neighbor no matter how seriously they need! You’d don’t have time. You don’t have time. You don’t have time.”
this is something that drives me nuts. No-one has the time any more. but wait a minute – go on, stop and wait a whole minute….and reflect on this:
There are still 60 seconds in a minute; there are still 60 minutes in an hour and 24 hours in a day and 7 days in a week and 52 weeks in a year. Our time is still there where it always was. So what has changed? We have filled our lives with so many unnecessary ‘time-saving’ devices that actually just take more of our time to deal with. I spend hours cooking just for the fun of it. I have a tiny kitchen without the room for all the gadgets the marketeers would love me to believe I can’t live without. I use a food processor only when my knives aren’t up to the job or if I want to liquidise something (although I may still use an old fashioned hand-operated ‘mill sieve’). I only tolerate a micro-wave for emergency defrosting and when mine breaks down I won’t replace it. It takes me less time to scramble an egg the classic way than it takes my sister to scramble (and overcook) them in her microwave anyway!
It doesn’t take me any longer to chop things than it would to assemble, disassemble and wash up the machine. I make bread – not nasty steam machine, just a simple mixture of wholemeal flour and water and yeast; left to rise once (40 minutes while I can do something else)and bake 40 more minutes – while I do something else.
I make the time to do the things I want to do. I can’t live without reading; I rise at 6, I shower and have breakfast and give myself 20 minutes at least to read before getting dressed and setting out for the day at the office (I leave at 8). When I get home I make the time to talk to my family (and the cat) before doing any personal chores I need to do, cook and settle for the evening.
I know that plenty of people have to juggle work and kids and family….but the time is still there for them; the same time that our mothers (OK maybe not all of you) had to wash diapers and cook and mash food for their babies and wash the dishes….and spend time with their kids and (my mum certainly) go out to work too.
I hear women in my Soroptimist club say ‘young women don’t have the time to join clubs like ours’ – but they have the time to play tennis or go to the shops with friends so of course they have the time to join a ‘service’ club working for the good of women in the world.If they get into the habit before they have a busier job and kids they will already have the time for one meeting a month programmed into their lives
what I’m trying to explain is that when it comes to having time we are back full circle to so many of Paul’s remarks…we have a choice. We can choose to be fraught and ‘stressed’ (I think some people would be stressed if they didn’t think they were stressed it is such a fashionable problem these days); or we can choose to manage our time; to program in the things we enjoy (and the chores); to maybe dump the Twitter (who really needs to know that you are drinking a coffee in Starbucks right now!)and the constant contact on IMs and take the time to write a letter (OK an e-mail)or sit and chat to a friend on the phone.
I think of the White Rabbit running down the tunnel looking frantically at his watch; “Oh my ears and whiskers; I’m late!’….for what? Nothing.
Take your time; listen to the world around you.
Make your time; you don’t have to be an expert in multi-tasking and most women are (although recent study has shown that multi-taskers actually get less done in the long run); just learn to manage your time. Use the space behind one activity to do another (like me and my bread).
You’ll be surprised how much time you have….
By xtexan86, January 21, 2010 @ 1:13 pm
On the topic of ‘time’, I just saw a news tidbit that claims children are spending just as much time playing with electronics (cell phone, internet, games, etc) than adults do going to work – 40+ hours a week. I’m not sure this is a good thing and I wonder when do they have time to let their minds daydream, or imagine? Will they really ever know who they are because they’re spending so much time trying to know everyone else? Ah, the questions never cease….”
Peace.
By valerie, January 21, 2010 @ 1:50 pm
Pam, it is never too late …..
_____________
The life is a incessant learning. We learn each day and at any age. We enrich us when we open our heart and when we accept to see to inner of us.
Sometimes it is necessary to learn how to see beyond its own feelings. That’s what Paul made , when he make us share its thoughts about the life. In that he is an altruistic man, spontaneous and full of wisdom. I really hope that he will make us share other philosophical thoughts.
This blog is an extraordinary human experiment and very enriching for each one among us.
By lady800cc, January 21, 2010 @ 1:50 pm
Hi X
Being the mother of teens, I find that I can learn a lot from them. I have found myself, sitting back on my high horse complaining about their “techno” generation and how I perceive them. But that in and of itself is judgement without knowing. We won’t know what young folks are thinking if we don’t talk with them on their level and sometimes, in their medium. My oldest was on SKYPE sp? talking to a friend of hers. They were having a deep conversation about music lyrics and creativity. If I hadn’t heard some of the conversation, I would have judged that she was wasting more time on the internet, and that was not the case. We have to be carefull of the labels society or other generations put on our young people. Some of these young people do astounding things and help countless of their own peers using mediums us ole heads are just not comfortable with. My Pastor has set a goal for all members in 2010, that we shall not criticize, only encourage our young people; you would not believe how difficult a task that is for some people, and that is truly sad.
Lady800cc
**Yeah I Ride**
By Softly, January 22, 2010 @ 6:43 am
Dear Mr. Glaser,
Have you ever sat next to a pool of water and dropped a pebble in, and then watched the ripples, and then watched the ripples meet other ripples and form new ripples.
That’s what’s happening in this blog-pool.
… Isn’t it pretty?
Watching, listening and learning, Softly
By Josie, January 22, 2010 @ 8:19 am
All right, Softly.
I will try. Thanks so much. All The best and also many Ippon to you.
Josie xx.
By sagacity, January 24, 2010 @ 4:02 pm
How very telling it is, this matter of “sharing” one’s opinion. All too often, in expressing that which one does or does no believe, the individual reveals far more about his personality, motives, or true “feelings” than is probably intended. More intriguing in the responses I read than the actual words and viewpoints expressed are the details they reveal about the faceless entities who offer them. For those of us who are captivated by human nature and human behavior, such discoveries (the information revealed not in what is actually spoken or intentionally offered but in that which is unconsciously or unintentionally disclosed) never fails to promote deep thought and unadulterated contemplation.
By Laertes, January 24, 2010 @ 4:22 pm
Ah, a fellow “cogitator of the human condition” (insert appreciative chuckle here). It is sobering to realise that much of what is revealed under the headings of “I believe” or “I think” is not what the speaker “thinks” or “believes” at all but what one feels SHOULD be accepted as truth or fact for fear of being ostracized or found inferior in some way. It is a topic (or should I say an idae) that I have revisited more and more in recent years. How much of what I tell myself and others I believe is REALLY and honestly what I hold to be true? How much of it is what I am afraid not to believe or a mask to disguis what I truly do, but am certain (or afraid) those aound me won’t accept or understand. As individuals its easy to take the notion of shared thoughts or opinions too lightly, especially since as you say, far more is revealed by what we don’t intend to say when an opinion is voiced than what is!
By Laertes, January 24, 2010 @ 4:24 pm
(Than “what is INTENDED,” that is to say!)
By Nadine, February 5, 2010 @ 6:14 am
En ce qui me concerne ce blog nous aide a apprendre qui nous sommes , a nous connaitre , la vie est a prendre a pleine dent ! mais il faut un sacre caractere pour le comprendre ! Je suis negative envers moi meme , je manque de confiance en moi de discuter entre nous tous est pour moi une ” chance inouie ” ! j’y ai rencontre des amis virtuels en qui j’ai beaucoup de reconnaissance , dans la vie je n’ai qu’une seule amie qui m’ecoute lorsque je ne suis pas bien ! C’est merveilleux d’avoir quelqu’un en qui avoir confiance !
Ma famille : mon mari , mes enfants sont les etres les plus merveilleux que l’on puisse avoir ! j’ai la chance aussi d’avoir encore ma maman et mon papa bien que mon papa soit très malade ! je n’ai plus qu’eux mes freres et soeurs sont faches avec moi , je ne sais pas pourquoi je ne le saurai jamais !
Voilà pourquoi ce blog est pour moi une chance de vous avoir “rencontres ” toutes et vous Paul je me sens bien , avec vous tous !
Il est vrai que la ” celebrite ” a du changer votre vie Paul , je ne sais pas ce que c’est d’etre celebre je n’ai pas eu le chance de vous rencontrer m
By Nadine, February 5, 2010 @ 6:23 am
En ce qui me concerne ce blog nous aide a apprendre qui nous sommes , a nous connaitre , la vie est a prendre a pleine dent ! mais il faut un sacre caractere pour le comprendre ! Je suis negative envers moi meme , je manque de confiance en moi de discuter entre nous tous est pour moi une ” chance inouie ” ! j’y ai rencontre des amis virtuels en qui j’ai beaucoup de reconnaissance , dans la vie je n’ai qu’une seule amie qui m’ecoute lorsque je ne suis pas bien ! C’est merveilleux d’avoir quelqu’un en qui avoir confiance !
Ma famille : mon mari , mes enfants sont les etres les plus merveilleux que l’on puisse avoir ! j’ai la chance aussi d’avoir encore ma maman et mon papa bien que mon papa soit très malade ! je n’ai plus qu’eux mes freres et soeurs sont faches avec moi , je ne sais pas pourquoi je ne le saurai jamais !
Voilà pourquoi ce blog est pour moi une chance de vous avoir “rencontres ” toutes et vous Paul je me sens bien , avec vous tous !
MERCI D’ETRE LA TOUTES ET TOUS !!!
Il est vrai que la ” celebrite ” a du changer votre vie Paul , je ne sais pas ce que c’est d’etre celebre je n’ai pas eu le chance de vous rencontrer mais croyez moi ma reaction serait la meme que la votre lorsque vous avez rencontre Gary Grant , j’ai vu David Soul à Londres je ne pouvais pas parle heureusement mon mari etait la ” le silence etait genant ” ma timidite et le fait de ne pas parler Anglais n’arrangeais pas les choses !
By Nadine, February 5, 2010 @ 6:54 am
Excusez moi pour le premier commentaire j’ai fait une faute de frappe je l’ai poste alors qu’ il n’etait pas fini !
By Sammy, February 13, 2010 @ 11:08 am
About teaching and learning from kids….
When we think of how to teach our children we also have to remember that we too were once children not that long ago. During the process of embracing adulthood many of us seize to remember that we are still children deep beneath our hearts. If you try to leave your body (theoretically) and watch how you behave and feel what you think you can go back to your childhood. Like Michael said we have to learn a lot from our children. Think about it…. we have to learn a lot from our childhood.. we are who we are today from what we have learnt and experienced from our childhood. Did anyone teach us to be who we are today? Is it what they taught made us what we are today? Or… is it what we saw in others and experienced made us decided to chose our own path to become who we have become today?
Yet.. we try to teach our children: we try to make their lives the perfect life we yearned during our childhood. We try to give them a chance to experience what we loved and try to protect them from the ‘unpleasantries’ we experienced as a child. (I don’t have kids of my own … yet .. but I have nieces and nephews that I feel are my own)/
This is how we try to convince ourselves that we have done something right. But our children will choose their own path no matter what we ‘teach’ them verbally. What’s important is what we share with them. What we let them to experience with us. When you are with a kid you learn from them and teach them unknowingly everything you should teach them when you yourself become a kid.
By HILDA LIPRACE, February 17, 2010 @ 12:07 am
Hello. nothing is accidental in life so I wanted to share what I read and my own thoughts as the text was extensive write what entendi-Involve one item on the death requires points of view with caution It’s a very intimate very strong argument for our concerns how Life becomes difficult when someone we love dies physical death is one step to another state of consciousness energy and a release for the sufferer and for stabbing a mystery that remains is a very big pain is felt and soul-bearing The emptiness and silence remain with the memories now conjugated joys and sorrows and to recall them spontaneously occur in that moment as vividly as-we all have to pass the test PRINCIPAL of life is part of living together and part of the growth is an unavoidable step that transcends the boundaries of razon.tenemos projects but sometimes dreams do not take with…..lost in materialism without giving space to the spiritual life being connected to the spirit we will be more integrated but not prepared to help us riches or poverty we accompany our actions we are ready with a positive attitude and fearless in the knowledge that we are needed in this travel in all its forms and handouts we are strong in the attempt and the generation of attitudes to grow in peace of mind and therefore life will help us move towards peace of mind of being – thanks God bless you Paul and Pam and the whole family and friends Hilda Liporace (Argentina)
By hilly, May 4, 2010 @ 11:09 am
I was watching some old interviews (trying to find something I thought I remembered) and I heard this:
…we all want to feel that we’re loved, that we’re appreciated, that we’re approved of, that we matter and belong and that we’re important; that we don’t have to die…we all want that experience of life and celebrity offers, to a great extent, ..the mirror of that, the illusion of that…
Paul, in an interview in 1981….
By chavie, May 4, 2010 @ 12:56 pm
@Hilly – Please check mail… it’s 4:41 — munching a sandwich. Hey, Hilly, as I asked you ( I have no idea if people will like me for asking it HERE ), do we need a celebrity to talk to each other? As I told Hilly, maybe Mr. Glaser is busy lately or teaching us to connect with each other even if there’s no “latest” blog. He’s human and he’s an artist. It’s difficult to write when one isn’t in the “mood”. He’s given us great “points of references” and that’s really good…
By hilly, May 5, 2010 @ 11:36 am
no I don’t think we need a celebrity to talk to each other but on the other hand how many of us would have found these discussions if we didn’t know who this celebrity was?
Chicken omelet again.
By chavie, May 5, 2010 @ 12:39 pm
so true, so true Hilly. I agree…but people like Mr. Glaser may be busy BTW, thanks. It’s another day. I want to tell you I appreciate your effort.
By carol leatherman, May 22, 2010 @ 4:15 am
Hi Paul, I do not think you are preaching at all. You have the right to share (however you want). I believe that we all need to share things we are thinking. Vent almost our deepest thoughts. If we keep them bottled up too long they become toxic. I have 2 sisters that have become so toxic that I can not be around them for very long because their negativity is like a cancer.
By heidi, June 16, 2010 @ 12:39 am
Just been reading this. WE like Cary Grant too. Mr favourite film was “Arsenic and Old Lace”–he made me laugh in that.
The other day, I was watching “North by Northwest”. That is a classic Hitchcock film and stands the test of time. Cary Grant was great in this story of mistaken identity.
Since I was 6 years old, I have been a Charlton Heston fan when I saw “The Ten Commandments”– I have always admired his work.
In the 1980′s, he came to England for theatre work. After the play, we were surprised to see him sitting outside the theatre–I got a shock and could not speak,like you till a woman punched me in the ribs and then I could talk to him!!! WE talked about poetry written by Vergil in Ancient Rome and as I was carrying a paper back of his life story, he signed it for me.–I liked him .
WEll when I got home, my mum laughed and said that these stars are just human beings like the rest of us!!!
By Pandra, June 18, 2011 @ 7:20 am
“….as we witness our feelings and thoughts and don’t try to defend or justify them, but see them as something that is happening to us and something we are reacting to, we get to make the distinction between the part of us that is learned behavior/conditioning, and the part of us that transcends that behavior and allows us to recognize ourselves in each other.”
Lovely thought here. Reminds me of CS Lewis and his thoughts on how souls can connect.